


That Wasn't a Genjutsu

by cafeinthemoon93



Series: The Nidaime's Assistant [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Age Difference, F/M, Founding of Konoha, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Reader-Insert, Senju Tobirama Needs a Hug, Shinobi, Slow Burn, Tags May Change, Teacher-Student Relationship, Training
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:15:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 26,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24810691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cafeinthemoon93/pseuds/cafeinthemoon93
Summary: You've been working as Tobirama's assistant for a long time now. As you improved, he trusted you to accomplish more complex tasks, and despite the possibility of never seeing you become a shinobi, he started to teach you basic self-defense techniques. However, the more you found out about your body and your limits, more you wanted to know. And it gave room to strange and inevitable things to happen.NOTE: You don't need to read the previous parts to understand this one
Relationships: Senju Tobirama & You, Senju Tobirama/Reader
Series: The Nidaime's Assistant [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1795480
Comments: 53
Kudos: 102





	1. I

**Author's Note:**

> Though I've put this work as a part of a series, each part of it can be read separately.
> 
> PART I (It Takes Courage) - COMPLETE  
> PART II (this one) - COMPLETE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After keeping you for months as the Hokage's assistant, Tobirama decides it is time to teach you basic self-defense techniques. You understand the intent of such training, but you could not foreseen everything that would be involved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yep here I am writing another Tobirama x reader lmao
> 
> For this first chapter I feel the need to point out some things:
> 
> \- Tobirama's explanation about the possibilities of reader becoming a shinobi or not were based on the principle that developing one's chakra pathway system must be twice as hard when the person didn't train at an early age, which is reader's case.
> 
> \- Because of that, things that are basic for common shinobi apprentices are, for now, out of her reach. And I believe her best chance to accomplish them is following a hard training routine, something close Rock Lee's style. However, her primary function is to serve as Tobirama's assistant, so she probably will never have the time required for that.
> 
> \- But yes, she didn't notice, but she already started to develop her pathway (it's implied that her training includes basic taijutsu), but as Tobirama said, it's too soon to state anything on this matter. Some things cannot be foreseen even by an experient master.

Several months passed since you’ve started to work as the Second Hokage’s assistant. During this time, your improvement was notable for anyone who met you.

You already had your qualities, which granted you this position, but then you’ve learned more than you thought to be possible for someone in your professional area, since your superior became something close to a master for you: with Tobirama Senju, you’ve learned the most practical methods of organization as well as to think as a strategist, so that he trusted you to accomplish tasks of the most varied levels of complexity.

And though you were not a shinobi, he taught you some techniques for personal defense, including the use of kunais and shurikens. He stated that not being a ninja wasn’t an excuse for one to not know how to identify dangerous situations in order to protect themselves. In this case, you discovered some interesting traits of your body that otherwise would remain a secret even to yourself: though your physical strength weren’t prominent, your movements were fast, for which you were able to deflect and avoid attacks with relative efficiency, as well as disarm your opponents; the things you became capable of doing weren’t enough to face a true shinobi, of course, but you could easily deal with common people if they tried to cause you problems.

It was true that you’ve never wasted your time with what you couldn’t accomplish, but you were interested in learning more about your limits, and many times you talked about this with the Hokage. For example, there was a time when you asked him if wasn’t really possible for you to become a ninja.

\- Though I haven’t been training since my childhood, I’m still young, Tobirama-sama – you argued – There must be enough time for me to develop my chakra pathway system. I just have to keep working as hard as I do today.

Tobirama didn’t dismiss your statement, nor he tried to dissuade you from it. Instead, he explained that things were not as easy as you imagined.

\- Y/n, you’ve already started to develop your pathway – he explained – You must have noticed an improvement in your physical strength, which now matches your speed. However, it takes years of training for one to achieve their full capacity, and you have been working for a few months only. Besides, unlike a shinobi student, you don’t spend entire days on your training. But you’d need to do this to compensate the lack of preparation in your childhood.

You sighed.

\- So, the answer is no.

\- I did not say that – he smiled – I know you’ve been working hard since I started to teach you. I’m just saying that you will need twice the time of a regular student to accomplish things such as being able to use ninjutsu. And I cannot give you hope telling you how much you will be able to do, no matter how hard you work, for it doesn’t depend on my will. This is the kind of question that you must wait for time to answer.

It did not disappoint you to know that you might never become a shinobi. Instead, it motivated you to do your best in everything you were taught. Your best was enough for you, as well as for him.

Since you communicated freely with each other, conversations like this were a common part of your days, and even more when you started your training. You’ve come to know each other in deeper levels, as you were part of the same family. Because of this, you never hesitated to ask him for help and advice when you needed, and always listened when he had something to say. However, with the growing closeness between you two came some matters about which you’ve never thought before, and for you didn’t know how to deal with them, you decided to keep them for yourself.

One day, during your training, you attempted a strike using a kunai. You were now confident about your speed and were developing a new technique based on it; you were trying to find a way to not be disarmed with a surprise attack, which would lead to problems during a real fight, and Tobirama was teaching you how to anticipate possible tactics an opponent could make in such case. He decided to make things a bit difficult for you this time, as if learning how to face him would turn your fights with any other person something that you could easily handle.

You were concentrated on each movement, in everything you were seeing, and started to gain confidence in the success of your performance, but somehow he managed to find a gap in your defense: when you came close, he found a way to hold your wrist with one hand and immobilize you with the other. You didn’t even understand what he did: in one second you were attacking; in the next one, you had him holding your wrist above your head, and with one simple movement of his fingers he made you drop the kunai; then he trapped you with his other hand on your ribs. Everything happened so fast that you thought he did both things at the same time.

Tobirama didn’t hurt you. However, for a moment you found yourself unable to move, and your breath escaped from your lungs. He kept you close to him, his arm wrapped around you, the heat of his hand sensed on your skin even through your clothes, the vision of his fingers closed around your wrist as if doing it was no challenge for him – and it wasn’t.

Maybe he sensed the discomfort in you, for he immediately released you and said you were finished for that day.

You came to your home and took care of your regular tasks.

You were tired, but you took a long time to get to your bed and to sleep. You couldn’t stop thinking about that moment. And you soon realized there was a reason behind it. You realized that you never really knew the Hokage’s strength and experience until that day; that was the first time you felt them in yourself. And, still, you knew he was restraining them, as if he was playing with a child. It was like he wanted you to understand that, despite knowing he would never hurt you on purpose, you must not forget who you were fighting against.

Since that day, you started to pay more attention to your training and to your performance. You became able to identify moments like that, when the sensations you had at that time would come out: the surprise, the fast heartbeats, the warmth on your skin that grew deeper every time you got close to him. You didn’t notice at first – or, let’s just say, you didn’t want to admit it – but you started to seek for those moments.

It was strange, but inevitable. You would never say it out loud, but deep inside you knew that you started to see them as the most interesting part of your days.


	2. II

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You come to his office one day only to hear some surprising news: Tobirama is going to travel to a city in order to solve matters with a feudal lord, and you are going with him. You've never been out of the village until then, so there are too many things to consider until the day of leaving.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, things are going to get a bit traditional here boys XD But in the end, the whole question lies on the fact that now reader is waking up for things that never bothered her before. How interesting can things get from now on? She's close to find out ;)

After seeing enough progress in your physical abilities, as well as in your confidence, Tobirama finally revealed his primary intent with your training.

One day, when you came to his office to leave some documents on his table, he asked you to stay, for he had something important to tell you. You cannot say you were  so surprised with this, because since you arrived that morning you noticed he was quieter than usual, which used to happen when he had a complex situation  or a big problem in hands. Fortunately, it was the first case.

H e had his eyes  fixed on some papers in front of him  when you entered the room, but he  looked directly at you  when he spoke.

\- Y/n, I remember you told me you’ve never been out the village before – he started –  However, when you started to work as my assistant, you were informed about the possibility of traveling  out of Konoha in case of need.

You nodded to show you remembered that too.

\- Well, the case has come. I have some matters to solve  with a feudal lord  in the city of (…).  It is not so far from the village and your services are necessary there, so you are coming with me.

Your eyes widened with the news. Your first travel out of the village! And with the Hokage?! That was too much to process at once.

Still, you managed to hear the rest.

\- To speak the truth, I knew that soon or later  this day would come – Tobirama explained –  The task will be long and might be a bit tiring for you, since it’s the first of this kind you are assigned to.  So, I used the time we had to make the necessary preparation, which included  both the last tasks you’ve accomplished and your training.  Speaking about the training, t he case is that, during your time in a city you’ve never been, you will need to take extra precautions.  The shinobi are not many in that city  in particular , which might compromise its security system.  Of course I will be responsible for your safety, but I thought  to be wise to teach you self - defense techniques  and the use of weapons.

Y ou didn’t reply instantly. You were thinking about what you’ve just heard. So, the security could be an issue during this task if  you  weren’t going to travel by the Hokage’s side, but at the same time things could get dangerous, and you supposed that  accompanying  him was a main reason for that. It was a bit confusing.  Well, thanks to your months of training, you had confidence in your own capacity of handling this.

Now your worries were  elsewhere . You, a single girl, leaving Konoha by a man’s side – that was probably what your parents and everyone else would hear as soon as they get know about the travel,  no matter how much you’d try to explain this was going to be just a business travel .  If you were a kid,  a student of him,  no one would say a word against it, but since you were adult  and a woman , the case was different.  Keep doing your work  wa s your main concern, yes, but how were you going to deal with this delicate question?

Well, apparently  all of this was anticipated by Tobirama.

\- We are not going to do this by ourselves, as you can easily guess –  he told you with his eyes fixed on yours – So that there will be no room for minor inconveniences as the ones you are considering right now.

Y ou were sure your face blushed as never before, but you managed to respond to that in an appropriate way.

\- Thank you for taking this into account, Tobirama-sama.

Your head was so full you could hardly fix your attention on anything when you left his office that day. You were so anxious that you had to take some minutes to rest and put everything in place before going back to your tasks.  So,  after all the you’ve spent on hard work and efforts,  you’ve reached such level of competence that now he trusted you enough to take you with him in a business travel. The realization of that caught you off guard, but you were so happy that for a moment all your minor worries disappeared.

There were going to be a few days for preparations still, but as soon as you came home you started to put your things in order.


	3. III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now you are in a new city, with different people and different things to see. At first, you are nervous with everything you have to process at once, but soon you come to get excited with the idea of being in a new place. However, you'll soon find out that danger can come in multiple forms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note about the name of the shinobi who takes reader to the city: this Mizuki has absolute zero connections to the Mizuki that appeared in the first episodes of Naruto's phase I. I just chose this name because I like it.
> 
> Anyways, soft moments are coming guys! I hope you enjoy them as much as I enjoyed writing them ;)

Talking to your parents about your first long travel was going to be your biggest challenge, and you knew it. So you took time to prepare yourself.

You elaborated a composed way to explain all the important details involved, such as characteristics of your destiny and how you were going to perform your work so far from home, which would be your father’s main worries, as the practical man he was. Your mother’s anxiety, on the other hand, laid on things of a different matter: was it appropriate for you to go out of the village this way? For _this way_ , you knew she meant _with a man_ , and though it was irritating for you to deal with such things (which you considered irrelevant and unprofessional), you anticipated your mother’s pertinent questions and calmly explained you were not going alone with him, and the whole work would not take too long.

In the end, they understood and promised they would not worry. You wanted to smile at the impossibility of seeing parents keeping such promise, but you accepted their word and went back to your home. You were not worried; the case is that, even if they didn’t approve it, they had no options, since it was your function and a decision from the Hokage himself – they could not argue with that. Speaking about this, you sensed it was wise of you not to talk with them about your training or the whole security thing.

Then the departure’s day finally came, and you, Tobirama and the other shinobi chosen to accompany you left the village at early morning.

  
  


***

The city to which the feudal lord’s property belonged was not really big, but the differences between it and Konoha were sensed by you since you first stepped into it. The streets, the entries of the houses and shops, as well as the amount of people walking around – all of this was a little surprising to you, and you took a few minutes to get your eyes used to it.

You thought you could easily be afraid if you were alone in that place. But you weren’t alone: you were always by Tobirama’s side, and from time to time he spoke to you to inform or remind you of something important about the mission or the territory; he probably noticed that talking ceased part of your worries, so that you would be free to concentrate on the most important questions.

\- It is a bit strange, isn’t it? To speak the truth, this city is not the same since my last visit – he was saying – But there’s nothing to worry about. Remember what you’ve learned about this place, and your training.

The way for the lord’s house wasn’t as long as you imagined. You’ve heard that he preferred to live near the city due to practical matters, and that was an advantage for your group as well.

You were received by the man himself, who followed all the appropriate formalities demanded by such occasion. Tobirama introduced you as his personal assistant, and you played your part as you were told. Everything was going as expected, except for one thing: something in the lord’s manners didn’t please you. You weren’t sure if it was exactly his manners or if the problem laid on some trait of his personality reflecting on the way he looked and treated you, so you decided to pay attention to find out. You remembered you were in a strange territory, so things could be uncomfortable at first; however, you were the type to trust your own guts, and if they were sending you an unsettling message, you weren’t capable of ignoring them.

Soon, you found out you were right to trust them.

The feudal lord just told his side of the story and now the Hokage was explaining what needed to be done about the situation. Judging by everything you’ve heard, everything would take a long time, but you trusted that he would find the appropriate solution, so you weren’t worried. You also weren’t bored. You were paying close attention to each word. The case is that, as time passed and you witnessed him perform with intelligence, firmness and clearness, not only you’ve learned from his experience but you developed some sort of respect that you’ve never had for anyone before. Apparently, the feudal lord seemed to be under this same impression as he listened to the Hokage.

But then Tobirama said you were going to be responsible for the treaty’s register, and the lord’s attitude were no longer the same. Of course he wasn’t reckless to the point of being openly disrespectful in front the Hokage, but his uneasiness was blatant.

\- Forgive me, Hokage-sama, but I need to express my worries on this matter. She seems to be a bit... young for such task.

You seem to be young for the work? Yes, that was the best way he could find to reveal what he really got in his mind – that you were a girl, and putting a girl to work on anything that wasn’t part of the domestic sphere was not a wise decision. That was the first feudal lord you’ve met in your life, but as a young woman, you knew that such mindset was common among his kind. And you hated it.

You moved on your place, and even opened you lips to reply, but fortunately for you – and unfortunately for the lord – Tobirama was aware of what was going on and was quick to react.

\- Y/n has been working for me for a long time, and I myself made sure to improve the abilities she already had. She knows everything she needs for the task. And I believe that, if I can put my trust on her, it must be enough for anyone else.

Silence. The lord’s first response was to startle and then try to contain his discomfort by nodding and mumbling some poor apologies, but the redness on his face didn’t go unnoticed by both of you. You, on your side, remained quiet; on the outside you were as serious as possible, but deep inside you were tasting his shame. The Hokage was the only one who had no difficulties to control his emotions in that room, and you silently thanked him for his composed manners.

Suddenly, you understood that situations like that were probably another challenge for which you have been prepared during those previous months of intense work. And even if sometimes you were close to doubt your potential, Tobirama considered you to be ready and believed in you, so now he wasn’t going to accept anyone looking down on you, whether it was due to your age, to your sex or anything else.

And if you had his trust, you wouldn’t let anything bother you.

***

Since the real work would not start until the next day, you were free to use your time as you preferred for the rest of that day. It would probably mean staying in your room for hours, having nothing to do but reading some books you found on a little shelf. You tried to read something, indeed, but the titles available were so uninteresting that you couldn’t reach the second page of any of them. You then observed their subjects with attention and noticed they fell in the same category: average poetry, fairy tales and even a recipe book. You didn’t want to waste your time thinking of this, but considering what happened with the feudal lord and the fact that this room was purposely arranged for women, that couldn’t be an accident.

You sighed and put the books back on the shelf, then walked toward the large door that led to the wood floor that surrounded the house and separated it from the soil of the large yard. You went outside and sat at the floor with you bare feet dangling just above the grass, observing the garden. That day was going to be long… or so you thought.

Mizuki, one of the men who traveled with you approached through the floor.

\- Y/n, the Hokage sent me to tell you that you can visit the city if you want. And, in this case, I should go with you.

You immediately stood up and smiled.

\- Oh, that’s good news – and, whispering – I’m so bored that I was about to die here. The books in my shelf are a monstrosity. Thank you for saving me, Mizuki.

The shinobi smiled.

\- Thank the Hokage for this!

Once you were ready, you both left the house.

  
  


***

  
  


Now that you had enough time to observe what you had around you, being at the city didn’t feel as overwhelming as the moment you saw it for the first time. You walked by Mizuki’s side and talked to him about everything you were seeing, comparing it with what you’ve learned about the city before the travel. Mizuki told you he has been there a few times before, and things were changing fast even for him.

But at some moment, he spotted a shop and smiled.

\- Well, it seems that not everything is different here – he pointed at the place – We can find interesting things there.

\- Really? Such as…?

\- Everything, including some treats, just like the ones you use to buy from that old man in the village.

Once you heard about sweets, you felt immediately willing to follow Mizuki to the shop.

You were both fascinated by what you found there. Mizuki told you where to find the best treats and you even found some of them similar to the ones you saw in the village’s shop. When you left, you decided to keep everything in the bag you brought with you, while Mizuki carried a bag from the shop. However, as you walked while organizing your things inside the bag, you slowed down your pace, so that you were a few steps behind the shinobi. You ended up dropping something on the floor and bent down to catch it.

The moment you stood up is when everything happened.

You saw a shadow approaching by the side you carried your bag, and then a hand grabbed it and tried to pull it away from you. A thief. You recognized it as the opportunity to use what you’ve learned from Tobirama during all those months: without thinking or waiting for a reaction from Mizuki, you lift your right leg and buried your foot in the thief’s chest. The man almost stumbled with both the strike and the surprise, but managed to stand his ground and come at you for the second time, holding a kunai. But it was too late for him: you were carrying a blade too, and you knew how to use it. You deflected his strikes and, after two attempts to get closer in order to disarm him, you did it. You kicked his blade out of his reach and gave him a second hit, this time on his belly.

The man finally fell on the floor, and you stared at him. Your hands were trembling; drops of hot sweat appeared on your forehead, your lungs burning with your heavy breath. You saw Mizuki grabbing the thief’s kunai from the floor and approaching to help you. You were going to tell him to deal with the man, who quickly left the floor and started to run, but Mizuki pointed to your right hand.

\- Y/n, you’re bleeding!

You looked down to the palm of your hand and saw red drops falling to the floor. You didn’t even felt the pain – how was that possible? Now the only thing you could say was “Oh”. Seeing your lack of reaction, Mizuki unraveled the bandage he had on his arm and wrapped it around your hand.

\- Thank you, Mizuki – you managed to say when he finished the job – Everything happened so fast that I didn’t have time to think.

\- You were lucky that he was not a shinobi, y/n. Now come. We need to go back and take care of this.

  
  


***

  
  


Your room was silent, but you sensed Mizuki’s consternation just through his breath.

He was standing at the front door, through which the light of the day entered, illuminating your spot. You were on your knees upon a carpet in the middle of the room, while the Hokage was in front of you, unraveling the improvised bandage to examine your injury.

The case is that, as soon as you arrived at the house with Mizuki, he sensed your presence and came to find you. When he saw the bandage on your hand, he didn’t wait for an explanation: he told you to follow him, for he would take care of that himself. And now you were there, waiting to see what was going to happen as Mizuki was questioned about the events at the city.

\- There was a moment when she was just two steps behind me, Hokage-sama – he was saying – One second was all he needed to approach her. It happened so fast I had no time to react. When I looked back, she was fighting the man.

Tobirama didn’t reply. Mizuki kept speaking, his eyes glued to the floor.

\- It was reckless of me. I apologize.

Again, not a single word in response. The Hokage kept holding your hand, staring at the injured skin; though it wasn’t hurting as you expected it to be, the vision of your blood increased your sensibility. And the shinobi’s nervousness seemed to grow deeper at every second. You understood his reasons: as someone trained to deal with situations like that, and that one not being his first time in that city, he should have been more responsible. Still, you didn’t want him to receive a severe discipline.

Finally, the long silence that followed his words became unbearable even for you.

\- Please, Tobirama-sama, don’t be so hard with him – you asked – It was not his fault. I should have been more careful. If there’s someone that needs advice, it is me.

Then, a verbal response came from him.

\- Mizuki, you’re dismissed – and, gazing at the man – I will talk to you later.

Mizuki nodded and left. Your eyes lingered on the empty spot where he was, then turned to the Hokage. And here you had a surprise. In his narrow, reddish eyes you saw a glimpse of worry that wasn’t present while Mizuki was with you; his attentions were now entirely on that injury, trying to determine its severity. That’s why he took so long to reply to the man’s apology: he wasn’t thinking about his imprudence; instead, he was worried with that injury. What was he seeing? Was it too serious?

You decided to ask about the real state of the things.

\- Is it too bad, Tobirama-sama? Please, say something.

There were medicine and clean bandages on the carpet between you. He separated a small bowl and, using his chakra, filled it with water; then started to clean the dry blood.

\- Despite being large, the cut is not deep – he explained while cleaning it – It probably happened during one of your attempts to disarm the man. If it was caused by one of his strikes, it would have been deeper. And harder to take care of.

You didn’t reply. You looked down to watch the work being done. And, surprisingly, it helped you to calm down.

Despite not being a doctor, Tobirama knew what he was doing. You supposed that, having faced so many things that would leave a terrible impression in a less experienced person like you, he soon learned how to deal with injuries, for the sake of the people who were with him and himself. When he first held your hand, it was shaking, but soon the warmth of his hand surrounded yours, and its strength sustained it; seeing the blood stop coming out while your skin was sanitized diminished your anxiety. When the medicine was applied, the damaged skin burned; you gritted your teeth, but refused to move your hand.

The cleaning session was complete, and Tobirama started to wrap the new bandage around the injury. It was a delicate work: using the inappropriate amount of strength would result in a new bleeding. It was when you felt a twinge and immediately pulled your hand away from his reach.

He stopped and looked at you.

\- Warrior’s hands. I cannot help it.

You felt the blush coming up to your face and smiled.

\- It’s okay.

He still had his hand held out for you; you put your hand back on his palm and let him finish the work. When everything was ready, you kept staring at your hand, resting on your lap while Tobirama was organizing the medicine and discarding the used bandage. The memory of the thief’s assault and the fight came back to you, and you sensed your blood pumping through the injury. You felt a lump in your throat and, before you could stop them, tears fell through your face.

You immediately started to wipe them out.

\- I suppose I’m being silly. I am so sorry for that.

You felt a warm hand on your shoulder. When you opened your eyes, you saw a smile on the Hokage’s face.

\- Take some rest. I will come back to see you.


	4. IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You come back to the house, have your injury cleaned and think everything is fine. You are left in your room to take some rest and you do it, but when you wake up you find out it's night already. How long you've been sleeping? And why?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> About the substance and the medicine: nothing is canon here, boys, it's just my idea lol Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter and feel free to peek out the Hokage's half-open door ;)

The lunch time was close when you went back to the lord’s house, but you didn’t leave your room to join the others at the table. Tobirama said he was going to explain the circumstances to the feudal lord and talk to him about the city’s current situation regarding civil security. When you expressed your worries about Mizuki, he told you to leave the case with him and assured you he wasn’t going to do anything he didn’t consider necessary.

You took a nap for what seemed to be a few minutes, until you heard someone knocking at the inner door. You weren’t really tired, so you were quick to leave the bed and see who was there. When you opened the door, you found a girl holding a tray with a bowl, hashi and a cup: a maid was sent to take your lunch.

\- Thank you – you said while taking the tray from her hands.

The girl looked down to your hand in bandages.

\- The lord heard about what happened. He prays for your recovery.

\- I’m glad for his consideration. Send this message for me, please.

She nodded and, after saying she would be back to take the tray, she left.

When you closed the door, you took your lunch outside with you. You sat at the wood floor and started to eat. You were a bit afraid of accidentally opening the cut, so you limited the movements of your injured hand; it ended up being uncomfortable, so you tried to use your other hand to hold the hashi, which took you twice the time you’d need to finish your meal. After that, you’ve spent some time there, breathing fresh air, until you decided it was time to go back inside.

After some time in a room with silence, warm temperature, nothing to do and no one to talk to, you soon felt sleepy. You closed the door, leaving a gap for the breeze to enter. You changed your clothes, then got a sheet for you and laid back on the bed.

  
  


***

  
  


When you woke up, the room was dark. You sensed it was also hot there, despite the gap you left on the door. You sat on the bed and passed your hand on your forehead; it was wet, and the sweat was hot. You felt a bit numb when you tried to move, so you massaged your legs to diminish the discomfort. When you felt strong enough, you pulled the sheets and stood up; at first you felt dizzy, but soon you found your balance and were able to walk. And once you started to do it, you sense the beginning of a headache. That was strange: there was nothing wrong with you when you fell asleep; why were you feeling like that now? You should be feeling good, well rested.

You went to the bathroom and washed your face to get rid of the sweat and decided to take a look at the outside.

When you opened the external door, you realized the darkness you noticed wasn’t just an impression: it was night already, and the wood floor and its surroundings were illuminated by the rounded lamps hanging from the walls. How long you’ve been sleeping? Well, did it matter? The only thing you knew for certain is that the events of the morning must have made you tired, more than you thought it was possible, for you to feel that strange.

You went back to the room to find a kimono and a pair of sandals, then left again. You closed the door behind you and started to walk through the wood floor, observing the darkness beyond the lamps’ reach.

A low purr was heard a few steps ahead. When you looked, you found a white cat coming out of a bush, walking slowly toward you. You smiled; you liked cats, and you noticed there were a few of them in the property when you arrived, but you didn’t have time to pet them. So that was your chance. When the cat approached, touching your leg with its head, you bent down to play with it.

\- Hey, what are you doing here, boy? – you said, and it meowed in response.

The cat was small, almost a baby. You took it in your arms and it immediately felt at will, closing its eyes; it was when you noticed it had some grey fur on its ears. You took a few steps while you talked to the animal in a cheerful tone as if it understood you.

You weren’t walking for long when you passed by a half-open door. And then it was like an instinct. You stopped just before the light beam formed by the lamps inside the room and looked through the gap. When you did it, your face burned.

That was Tobirama’s room. Because you followed the servant who indicated everyone’s chambers, you knew that his room would be close to yours; still, the vision caught you off guard: with his legs crossed, he was sitting with a book on his lap, and was just turning a page of it; he was wearing no kimono, no shirt and his _happuri_ * was off. His chin was leaning on his other hand, and his eyes were going from one side of the page to another, as if there was nothing to catch their attention beyond it. It was the closest thing to distraction – relaxation – you’ve ever saw in him.

Yes, he was the same man you’ve seen everyday in Konoha’s office: the serious, composed attitude was still there, so that he seemed to be studying the book’s content more than having fun with it. But that was a side of him you didn’t know about – a side he never found necessary to show to anyone. Then you realized that this discovery was not the first of its kind you’ve experienced towards him, and that made you think of your last months with him and the changes that came with them.

You’ve talked more to each other, spending much time in each other’s company, your job not being the only reason for that: you were always seeing each other in your favorite parts of the village; besides, in his own way, Tobirama got closer to your family, which meant getting closer to you. Apart from that, he was now training you, teaching you to protect yourself and to be prepared for emergencies; with this, your connection reached the physical stage. And the most impressive part of this was that none of you found it strange. Well, at least you didn’t, until that day when he held you close to stop your assault.

And that’s why you held your breath at what you were seeing right now. Your body remembered what you felt that day, and you sensed in yourself a sudden urge to have him holding you that way again.

Something brought you back to reality – if it was the cat moving in your arms or anything else, you didn’t know – and you suddenly realized how inappropriate it was to stand there, spying on the Hokage. You looked away and walked to escape the light’s reach; it would be too much for you if he saw you and thought you were sneaking.

But, well, it was strange that he still didn’t notice you there, wasn’t it? That was what you were asking yourself when you heard the door opening behind you, its noise followed by some steps on the wooden planks.

\- Y/n. You’re awake.

You turned. Tobirama was standing beside the door; he was on bare feet, but had a black kimono around his body: that piece cloth was the first thing he found before leaving his room. The yellowish light was spreading through the floor like fire; the same yellow lighted up the red shade of his eyes glimmering toward you. The light also touched his clothing, and you saw that it wasn’t black, but dark blue.

But now you had no time to think. You just needed to answer him.

\- Tobirama-sama… evening.

Suddenly you remembered you were carrying the cat.

\- Look. I made a new friend.

He approached and caressed the cat; it purred at his touch. Then he turned his attention to you.

\- How are you feeling?

\- I… – that question should be expected, but it caught you off guard – To speak the truth, I’m not feeling so well. I’m a bit tired and with a headache. I wasn’t expecting that fight to do so much to me, honestly.

Tobirama didn’t reply immediately, and stared at you with a serious look. Then you remembered he said he would see you later that day and asked about it.

\- I did – he revealed – Actually, I came to your room twice, but you were sleeping in both of them. The second time was just a few moments ago.

You started to think his preoccupation didn’t fit the size of the injury. Was there something he wasn’t telling you? But such attitude didn’t look like him. Unless...

\- Tobirama-sama, you seem too worried about my state. And, speaking of it, you were very quiet while you examined my hand. Is there something we should be worried about?

He was still serious, but didn’t deny you an explanation.

\- You are right. I was worried and I had my reasons, but I needed to be sure before talking to you. Now, let me ask you: did you notice something unusual in your skin around the injury?

Your heart jumped inside your chest.

\- No, I didn’t see anything.

\- But I did. There was a dark shade forming around the cut. I saw it as soon as I unraveled the bandage Mizuki wrapped on your hand. When I cleaned the blood, my suspicions increased. This kind of shade appears when the injured skin is touched by a substance found in a species of herb that grows in the mountains no so far from here. It is undetectable by smell and color. It was probably on the kunai’s surface used by the thief to attack you.

Now you couldn’t remain composed and interrupted him.

\- Are you telling me that I was poisoned?!

\- No – his tone was so firm that you were sure he wasn’t trying to spare you from anything – This substance is not classified as poison. It is a kind of drug that causes numbness, dizziness and headache, and it is used by some robbers to delay their pursuers without the complications of a murder. I had a conversation about this with the feudal lord, and he told me that, despite knowing about such tactics, no reports of them were registered by the city’s police force during the last years. He was really alarmed.

\- So, this was an isolated case?

\- We do not know yet. Besides, that is why I told Mizuki I was going to talk to him later. Since he brought the thief’s blade with him, I asked to examine it. As I expected, there was nothing detectable in it but your blood, so my only option was to pay attention to you for the next hours in order to find out the state of things. And judging by what you just told me and the fact that you’ve been sleeping for eleven hours, I know the substance was present.

Eleven hours?! You weren’t expecting that. But the presence of this substance explained your strange symptoms, and that was enough to scare any normal person.

And you were scared.

\- What are we going to do now?

He was quick to reply.

\- I did a research on the lord’s private library and found some medicine developed to neutralize this specific substance. I’ve sent Mizuki to buy it from a medicine seller in the city, and he brought a good amount of it.

You had no reasons to doubt his words. Still, there was something you didn’t understand.

\- But why didn’t you wake me up and give me this medicine, Tobirama-sama?

\- It would not work if things were done this way, y/n – he explained – Depending on the level of intoxication, the individual’s body can get its energy quickly drained without a long rest. I believe the blade was entirely soaked in the substance. This explains why you’ve slept for so long. Also, keep in mind that, just like the drug, the medicine acts in your circulatory system. Having two different substances running in your veins while your body is exhausted would overwhelm you.

\- So, waking me up would only interrupt the necessary action to enable my recovery.

He nodded. You mumbled an “I see” more to yourself and less to him, and sighed with the headache increasing. You went out for an innocent walk around the city and ended up drugged by some ruffian’s blade, something that apparently haven’t happened in years. And this is how your first day in the new city started. Unbelievable.

You’ve been feeling some shivers through your body since you left your room, but you thought it was due to the night breeze until your hands started to shake. The cat woke up and seemed irritated by that, and you bent down to put it on the floor. When you released it, the animal ran to the darkness of the yard.

You heard the Hokage’s voice above you.

\- Now come, y/n. I believe you are ready to take the first dose of the medicine.

Then you didn’t know if you stood up too fast or something, but a sudden dizziness caught you, and your legs weakened. You tried to say something, but your voice wouldn’t come out: your tongue was now too heavy to move. Soon your vision darkened, and the pain was pounding in your head. You would have fallen if Tobirama wasn’t there: you felt when he wrapped his arms around your body and lifted you, as if its whole weight was null.

_*Happuri is the name of the forehead protector used by Tobirama._


	5. V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You just took the bitter medicine to counteract the substance's effect, but as Tobirama said, the night will be long for you. Your discomfort is beyond description and the hours pass like years. Fortunately, you are not left alone to deal with this: the Hokage is there taking care of you, even when doing so means spending all night awake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaand finally that chapter that justifies the story's title! Writing it didn't took as long as I thought it would, but the process was intense. The reasons? You will soon find out ;)

When you tried to open your eyes, they seemed to burn with the yellow light spreading above them. Your headache was still there, and despite not moving a single muscle, it pierced you behind your eyes.

You sighed. In an attempt to speak, your voice didn’t come out: your throat was dry, sore. When you moved your hand to put it upon your forehead, you noticed it was trembling; your whole body was shivering as if it was cold, but the air around you was hot. Did you get a fever? Probably. The substance was more dangerous than you imagined.

You made a second attempt to open your eyes, and because this time you had your hand to protect them from the light, you did it. Once they got used to the light you moved your hand away and looked around.

Slowly you understood your circumstances. You were lying on a bed just like the one you had in your room, but that was not your room. As you imagined, Tobirama carried you to his own room. You didn’t find it strange: his room was the closest place to which he could take you, his door was already open and the medicine was probably there. Well, that was what your brain told you. Your emotions and scruples, on the other hand, directed your attention to the fact that you were not yourself: now you were an untidy girl lying on a man’s bed. You were exhausted, and scolded yourself for letting such irrelevant things bother you.

You leaned on the bed, trying to sit, but your arms couldn’t stand your weight. You fell back on your pillow and you felt an explosion of pain inside your head. You let a moan escape. Tobirama was standing at the door, looking at the shadows out there, but once he heard you, he turned inside and came to help you. He put his hand on your forehead, and then on the sides of your neck. You shivered: his hand was cold. Or so it seemed to you.

\- Fever – he said, more to himself than to you – It is time for the medicine.

He held you while you sat on the bed, your body shaking under his touch: once you stood on your place, you passed your arms around yourself to contain the trembling. There was a small table on the opposite side of the room, close to the place where you saw Tobirama reading. He went to it and brought a bottle and a cup with him. He poured some drops from the bottle to the cup and filled it with water through his chakra, then gave it to you.

You held it with both hands. Because they were trembling and the injured one started to hurt, you were afraid to drop the content and tried to swallow it at once, but you weren’t counting on the bitter taste that filled your mouth and burned your throat. You pulled the cup away from you lips and almost choke.

Tobirama took the cup from your hands.

\- Easy.

When you finally stopped coughing, you sensed your cheeks burning.

\- I’m sorry.

His response was to help you with the cup as you took the medicine. The bitterness was present in each drop of it and your dry throat needed some time to get used to it, but the taste didn’t stay in your mouth and the coldness of the water was the only thing left.

When you finished the cup’s content, Tobirama took everything to the table and came back to your side.

\- Despite the hours you’ve spent sleeping, you will have to stay in bed for more time – he stated – Your body must be in rest to completely absorb the medicine. The fever must diminish in a few hours, but until then you might feel uncomfortable. The headache will end when the fever go away. The shivering, on the other hand, will only cease when your nervous system get free from the substance’s influence and your muscles finally get some rest, which will not happen until tomorrow. The night will be long for you, y/n.

You didn’t gave him an immediate response. You were still feeling cold, and pulled the sheets to cover yourself. Not only you were sick, but you had other preoccupations in mind, so that when you spoke you showed concern about practical matters, such as your work.

\- What is going to happen if I don’t recover in time, Tobirama-sama? What if I cannot do my job – your voice was so weak you that thought you wouldn’t be able to finish the sentence – I didn’t travel so far only to become a burden to a feudal lord.

He was quick to release you from such worries.

\- Do not think about this for now. I’ve talked to the feudal lord. I explained to him that I will take care of you myself and that our shinobi will be ready in case we need something, so that there will be no need to occupy his servants. He understood the situation and gave us more time for the treaty.

You had no strength nor reasons to argue with that. Yes, you still felt ashamed for being the reason of all that rescheduling, but there was nothing you could do except obeying the Hokage’s instructions and staying in bed.

He helped you to lay down again and said he would be there if you need something.

  
  


***

  
  


As Tobirama said, that night was long.

The first hours were the hardest. The headache didn’t let you rest, and you kept turning on the bed trying to find a comfortable position, but soon you got so tired you couldn’t move a finger. While you were lying on your right side, looking at the room’s half-opened door, you saw when Tobirama turned out the light and the room was drown in shadows except for the light of the lamps outside; under their influence, the matter of the door seemed translucent, as if it was mist around the yellow light. You kept looking, and the vision of it soothed your uneasiness, though you still felt the headache.

After some time you were still cold, but your clothes and the sheets were clinging to your skin because of the sweat. Well, that was kind of disgusting, but it was a good sign: your fever were diminishing, and maybe soon you would be able to get some rest.

You didn’t realized you fell asleep until you woke up with a startle. You looked around and noticed the room was still dark and the lamps out there were turned on, just like they were before. Your headache was still there, but now it was bearable: you could move your eyes without the piercing sensation behind them. Your throat was sore, and your tongue was scratching your palate. The cold diminished, but you could still feel the sweat under your clothes. Your body was still trembling.

In the dark, you looked for Tobirama and found him sitting at the door: he took the couch where he was reading and put it there, probably to stay close to the light. You weren’t sure if he was sleeping, but when you made your first attempt to sit on the bed, he straightened up on his spot and turned to you. That didn’t surprise you, since you knew well that shinobi were light sleepers.

He came to your side and asked if everything was okay. You said you needed some water. When he got it for you, you explained you wanted to go back to your room to take a bath and change those clothes soaked in sweat. He nodded in agreement; he helped you to leave the bed and walked you to your room. There, you slowly separated your things and went to the bathroom.

You didn’t remember taking a bath that did so good for your body and soul before. Not only the sweat, but the pain in your muscles and part of your mental exhaustion were gone with the hot water. Now you were sure you could take a proper rest for the next hours. When you left the bathing area, you felt twice as cold, but that cold was better than anything you felt until that moment. You dressed the clean clothes, and their soft fabric was like a hug.

When you left the bathroom, Tobirama was waiting at the external door. Once he saw you, he came to help you. He walked you back to the other room and told you to stay on the couch for a moment. Curious to know what he was going to do, you obeyed as he turned on the room’s lamp. He opened the wooden arc at the edge of the bed and took clean sheets out of it, then went around the bed, taking off the sweaty sheets and replacing them with the new ones.

You watched in silence as he worked. Since there was nothing to do but to wait, it was impossible not to think of it as more than the simple gesture it was. As you saw him doing many times before, he was giving up his own time to rest to take care of the people with him. Other people in his place would let such task to a servant and would only come to your room in the next morning to ask how you’re feeling, but that was not his way: he was sparing both the lord’s people and his shinobi and managing everything by himself, as he would do to someone of his family. Well, as a man who lived by the Will of Fire, he saw you as his family. Still, that seemed too much for you.

It was when you realized that not for a single moment you feared for yourself. You were only worried about being a burden for others instead of being afraid to die or to see the sickness increase. And that was because you trusted him as you never trusted anyone else. Tobirama gave you countless reasons to trust him to this point: he chose you to work for him, prepared you and looked for you to make amends when things didn’t go as expected; he recognized your talents and helped you to develop them as much as you could; and finally, he started to teach you how to fight. Now he was more than your Hokage: he was your master and your friend, and your trust, admiration and respect for him would only grow.

When everything was finished, Tobirama helped you to go back to the bed. While you were sitting on it, straightening the sheets around you, he sat on your side and verified your body temperature.

\- The fever diminished – he said with his hand on the right side of your neck – It will cease soon. And once you take the second dose of the medicine, it will not come back. You just need to keep resting.

You agreed in silence, but let a sigh escape. You were still worried; you couldn’t help it. It didn’t go unnoticed by him.

\- What’s wrong?

\- Well, it’s just that… You should be resting, Tobirama-sama. You should try to sleep. If I took the medicine, I will be fine. You should take time to take care of yourself.

\- You don’t need to worry about me, y/n.

His reply to this was just as expected. What was not expected was your reaction to it.

\- But I do! – you said, and your tone was loud in the silence of the room – Please, do not tell me to not worry. It’s out of my reach.

He was about to move his hand away from your neck, but he stopped once he heard your words. In his eyes, you saw his attempts to process what they meant: knowing him as you did, you understood how strange it was to him, having someone worried about his welfare instead of being worried with someone else. He was so used to work for others that he didn’t often consider the possibility of seeing the opposite happen.

Slowly, you took your hand to your neck and put it in upon his hand. You held it close to your skin, the same strong, warm hand that cleaned your injury and measured your fever and was now comforting you, trying to convince you that taking care of you was far from being a burden. You took his hand to your face, holding its fingers, and forgot anything else: now you only wanted to smell the scent of his skin, to feel his strength in you again.

Suddenly everything was so overwhelming that your eyes burned, and tears rolled down through your face. And then you were being silly again; well, you never understood why you called it being silly, but that’s how you felt when you cried in front of Tobirama. Apparently that wasn’t a problem to him, because soon he wiped your tears with his thumb, and when you least expected, he passed his arms around you, holding you in a hug.

The firmness, the warmth with which he held you made all your sadness and worries go away. You hugged him back in response, hiding your face on his shoulder, sensing as he tightened his arms around your body. You were so small, so sensitive; you never knew it was possible to feel as well cared and safe like that.

So it happened. Those emotions you felt during your training came back. You felt unquiet, for you didn’t know if he was aware of the heat coming up through your skin. You knew he could sense many things, but would he be able to understand if he sensed something like this? What would he think of you if he did?

He loosened the grip, but he didn’t pulled his hands away from you: he just moved far enough to look at you. Still, he was too close; you looked down when you saw those red, narrow eyes on your face, and felt his breath close to you.

From that moment, things were not clear nor linear to you: when you noticed, you already had your hand touching his face, your thumb following the path of the red line he used to draw on his chin, then the one under his left eye; and his response to your touch came faster than you thought to be possible: holding your chin and separating you lips with his finger, his mouth came close to meet yours in a kiss.

It was how you imagined being caught by a genjutsu should feel like. That was not the reality you knew. That was not a room, you were not on a bed and were not a sick girl: you were someone else, in somewhere else, and only knew that things must be that way. And he was not Tobirama Senju; he was not the Nidaime Hokage, not your master or a mere friend: he was just a man, and a man who only wanted to keep his mouth on yours, to touch your tongue with his, tightening his fingers around your waist, keeping you close, so you finally understood what was it that you wanted, what you felt that day of training that you took for just fascination for his strength: you wanted him; and you wanted to see him making you more than just a woman – making you _his_ woman.

Saying that to yourself was scary and bold, even more than the kiss itself, but it was also an act of freedom. Not having to watch every step, every change of mood and letting him know everything was like taking off a burden from your back. And the most unbelievable part of this was that it wasn’t a dream. No, that wasn’t a genjutsu.

It was reality.


	6. VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If that kiss was a dream or a genjutsu, you wouldn't mind stucking in it. But it was nothing but reality. And reality always hits harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of this chapter is such a guilty pleasure of mine XD Since it's Tobirama we're talking about, no wonder reader ended up disoriented lmao Also, our bbs are starting to have some cumplicity here ;)

None of your days of training were as stormy as that kiss.

There was a part of you that  knew your face  was as red  as  can  be  with all the heat  coming up.  Your  body  was still shivering, but it  wasn’t a problem for you anymore. You also knew you were going to  end up  tired and  sweaty again if you didn’t stop, but  there was no way for it to bother you  while you had  that man’s lips on yours.  A s you imagined, being with Tobirama Senju  meant not thinking about anything else than  what you were doing now . You didn’t even try:  with his large hands  around your waist,  keeping you in place,  he wouldn’t let you.

Y ou knelt on the bed;  w ith a soft moan,  you let  your left hand lean on his shoulder, squeezing the fabric of his kimono, while  the right one  caressed the back of his head,  your finger s lost in his hair. It was only  when you started to pull  it that you heard him whisper ing your name  with his lips still upon yours,  his voice as low, as harsh as you never heard it before .  That’s when you realized  what the kiss did to him – what  _you_ did to him.

And  that brought you back to reality.

T his was how it feels like being pulled out from a genjutsu, or so you thought.  Once his voice woke  you up, y our hands  slowly moved away from him, closing so hard  that your  palms started to hurt;  the injury immediately burned under the bandage, and you held the fragile hand with the other for a moment. Y our  mouth was  now  separated from his, but you were close enough to  share  your breath;  you were breathing so  deep , yet you thought you were suffocating. For a moment, you really forgot about everything: you forgot who you were, and who he was. And when the memory was tossed back to you, you froze.

You covered your mouth with your hand. You felt his grip around you loosing; soon,  his hands let you move, and you sat back on your spot. Trying to  avoid his eyes, your trembling hands started to pull the sheets to cover your body: though the clothes you wore didn’t show anything you needed to cover,  you felt exposed;  now you were  a flustered, blush ing and disheveled girl who just exceeded all limits  and dared desire the Hokage.

When you finally controlled yourself and raised your eyes to him, Tobirama was already back to his composed manners, but it didn’t escape you that his breath was still heavy, and his face was red beyond the three marks; you looked down to his hand on the mattress and saw his fingers squeezing the sheets.  Yes, it wasn’t pleasant for you to see him in such discomfort, but you sort of appreciated that moment:  it was one of those rare moments when you were reminded that he was flesh and blood, as  much as  human as you.  Still, things were different that time: every time he let that side of him show, you were nothing but a spectator, witnessing something in which you had no part; now, you were not only a part, but the reason behind such revelation.

And  in your heart you knew  you were overjoyed with your work.

When he spoke, some of the harshness you noticed before was still there, but it was clear that it would soon be gone and he would be himself again in a few moments.

\- Take some rest… Or you will get tired again. I will be at the door if you need something.

And without waiting for a reply, he left the bed and went back to the couch.

He stood there in silence, looking outside; you laid back on the pillow, but you didn’t close your eyes: you kept looking until his breath calmed down, and after some time you even thought he fell asleep.

  
  


***

  
  


When you opened your eyes, you sensed the morning was grey. The yellow lamps out there were turned out;  everything was now  touched by  the soft, cold light of the first hours of the day spreading through the wooden floor and the translucent walls separating the room from the weather outside.  You soon noticed you were alone.  The silence was absolute around you, the only things sense d by your ears being your own breath and the noises of the fabric when you moved under the sheets.

Once you woke up, you knew  you  were not in your best; still, you were healthy and  well  rested compar ed to your circumstances during the night: your injury wasn’t  throbbing anymore, and the only thing you felt was a tug on your skin when you closed or opened your hand; the fever was finally gone, and you weren’t feeling cold, nor was your  skin clinging in sweat; you felt some tiredness in your muscles, but the shivering was almost gone now, so you knew they would  finally have a chance to rest.

Y ou tried to sit and noticed you were able to do it without help: you  were  regaining your strength.  You pushed the sheets and let your feet touch the floor; the coldness of the wood surprised you, but you managed to stood up and walk toward the door. In its own way, the morning was beautiful, its subtle light covering the green grass, the wood floor and everything else like a winter blanket. A breeze passed by you with  a  whisper through your hair, and you closed your kimono t o protect yourself.

You found your sandals  at the door, put them on and went to your room.

Once you close d the bathroom’s door behind you, the memory of the night before came back to you, and your cheeks blushed in front of the mirror.  It was like  some kind of dream you wouldn’t talk about with anyone, except that it wasn’t a dream.

You washed your face, avoiding your reflection, but you knew you’d have to face yourself while you brushed your hair, so you took a deep breath and looked. And it was strange, but  the more you looked at your face in the mirror, the more you felt… pretty. There was never a time when your skin  and your lips  had that rosy shade before, or  when  your eyes were so bright.  You smiled to yourself and left the bathroom.

In your way back to the other room, you heard a meow and felt something soft  touching your leg. You looked down to find the white cat of the previous day. You bent down to pet the animal, smiling.

\- So, we met again, little friend.

The cat rub bed its head on your hand in response.

Y ou were so distracted playing with the cat that you didn’t noticed you were no  longer the only human there.

\- This cat came to see you two or three times while you were sleeping last night. It’s an affectionate animal.

You raised your head  and found him standing beside his room’s open door, as if he just came out from it.  It was like an instinct: in his face, you looked for anything to tell you how the memory of the last night settled in his perception. But you found nothing. Didn’t he remember anything? Was it really an illusion? Or… didn’t it affect him as much as you imagined?

Y ou stood up as he walked toward you; the cat  stood there, but soon it gave up trying to regain your attention. When he stopped in front of you, you noticed the last trac es of a blush on his cheeks  and a glimmer in his eyes just like you saw the night before . So he remembered that  kiss  as much as you did.  Though  he was good to hide  things, he couldn’t to hide  that from you.

Before you started to  stutter , you nodded and forced your voice to come out.

\- Good morning, Tobirama-sama.

His reply was as composed as expected.

\- Good morning, y/n. I hope you rested well. How are you feeling now?

That question would sound normal if the circumstances were different, but that time it only made you wonder what he was trying to do. Was he trying to prevent any mention to what happened just a few hours before? Was he trying to bring back the normality of your connection, which was probably lost forever after that?  He wasn’t a fool to do such thing. So what was that?

You decided that the best way to find out was to follow this scheme and see what happens.

\- I’m feeling better now, thank you – you said – The headache is gone, and though I’m still feeling some shivering, it doesn’t bother me anymore. I’m not as tired as I was yesterday.

\- And what about the fever?

\- It’s gone too – you passed your arms around yourself – But it’s cold here. I wasn’t expecting this.

\- I see. Well, standing in this cold weather might not be good for you. Let’s go back to the room. You are visibly better, but you still need another dose of the medicine.

Tobirama offered  you  his arm. You considered refusing his help at first, but since you were still weak, you held his arm and  let him walk  you back to his room.  The cat was still wandering around and it followed you,  but none of you tried to stop it. The animal found a corner inside the warm room and laid there, curl ing up around itself and clos ing its eyes to take a nap.

While you were sitting on the bed, watching the Hokage  as he  prepar ed the medicine, you  wondered if he took some time to sleep  after leaving you . He didn’t seem tired, in fact, but you suspected the answer would be  _no_ in case you asked him. And if you heard such answer, you’d be bothered: it  was almost impossible to convince him that you were not at war and  that  he could use the time he got to rest  as a normal person . Y es, y ou tried to do it last night, but, well, it didn’t work out.

Besides, that silence was unbearable. You needed to find  something to say,  something to talk about.  And fortunately, you did w hen he brought the cup with the medication to you.

\- I will not tell anything to my parents, Tobirama-sama.

His eyes raised to you as fast as they could when he heard this. Did he think you were talking about the kiss? You  didn’t know, but just in case, you  made things clear.

\- I mean... About the work. We will have to stay  here  for more time than we’ve planned, and it will probably make them worried.  I know they will  question  this delay w hen we go back to Konoha,  so I  wi ll say that I fell sick and you took care of me.  But they don’t need to know all the details.  Knowing th at you were by my side must be enough for them.

Y our tone were different even to yourself when you said that. The truth is that you’ve been thinking you should have a better control over the information you shared with your parents. It wasn’t that you r l ove  for  them  was diminishing ; you just needed  to learn how  to keep some things to yourself. It was what  people call growing up. You were a bit tired of having to answer to every question they  had about your activities, and a change like this would  represent a relief for you .

Y ou didn’t know anything about the kind of relationship Tobirama had with his own parents, but  by the look he gave you, you saw that  he was  quick to understand  the reasons behind  your intent.

T he only reply he had to you was:

\- As you wish.

You finished the medicine and gave the empty cup back to him. However, before he carried away, a sudden idea came to you. You touched his hand, and immediately got his attention.

\- There’s something I need to tell you, Tobirama-sama.

He nodded and waited. You saw that he didn’t remove his hand from your reach.

\- I want to say that I do not regret… what happened.

His red eyes gazed you for a moment, as if he wanted to read in your face the same truth he heard in your words. Then you felt his hand closing around yours.

\- Nor do I – his fingers gave yours a soft squeeze while he spoke – But we will have the time we need to talk about this when our work here is done.


	7. VII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You take the last dose of the medicine, and finally you are ready to do your work. After all you've been through, you are a bit nervous, but the Hokage assures you that the unhappy circumstances didn't change his trust in your capacities.
> 
> Besides, you still have some matters to solve after the work is done, and for this you will have to maintain your disposition and your courage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything is going to be in its right place for these two <3
> 
> I know exactly how this story will end, so I was planning to write one more chapter, but I'll probably end up writing two. Actually, it will depend on how much space the details will take, bc I don't want to write a long chapter. But whether I write one or two more chapters, they must be understood as just one.

That day was better than the previous one.

Despite the weakness that limited your movements and slowed your pace when you needed to walk, the improvement in your circumstances was directly sensed in your body. You also  took  the time you  had  to rest:  the silence in your room was a relief for the final moments of your headache, that  would  disappear by the evening; on the other hand, listening to the wind blowing among the trees of the feudal lord’s garden and the birds singing was a necessary reminder that things would be good again.

You didn’t spend all those hours alone. The girl who served your lunch on the previous day came back to bring your meals; you talked to her for a while, and since you were two of the few women in the house, it helped you with your loneliness. You found out that her name was Chyio and that she was your age. She talked about her life and work under the lord’s supervision, and according to her, it wasn’t as hard as you suspected when you first met the man: he had his quirks and a deep attachment to traditions as any other lord had, but he was a good man after all. You decided to take Chyio’s information into account in your next encounter with him.

Mizuki came to see you, bringing some of the treats you bought in the city. By his tone and expression, you saw he still blamed himself for what happened, and the treats were there to work as an apology. You liked him and it was sad to see him in such state, so you did your best to convince him that he had no fault in this and you should be more careful in a place you’ve never been. Besides, all the training you’ve been doing for months was not in vain, for you managed to disarm and scare the robber to the point he decided to run instead of fight you. You also reminded him of the previous missions in which he succeeded, as the good shinobi he was. In the end, Mizuki left your company relieved from his guilt, promising to not think about this anymore.

Y ou’ve spent the entire morning inside those chambers, sometimes lying on the bed, other times reading the books you found there (which were way more interesting than the ones in your own room) or playing with the white cat,  that almost didn’t leave your side: you saw the animal walking around the bed, sleeping  up on it close to your feet  or sitting at the door, as if it was guarding the entry.

And t hat’s  exactly what the cat was doing by the  afternoon when Tobirama came to see how you were doing.

He left you in the morning, right after giving you the second dose of the medicine, but you didn’t question him whether he would come back soon or what he was going to do: you knew that he would take the time to discuss the final matters of the treaty with the feudal lord or even anticipate part of the work. By that time, you were also feeling good enough to pass a few hours without assistance and, besides, you wanted some time alone to process what happened between you two.

You were sitting on the bed with a book on your lap when you heard the cat meowing. You raised your eyes to the door and found Tobirama leaning on one knee, caressing the animal’s back. You couldn’t help smiling at the scene and think to yourself how funny was this reaction of yours: after all, the tense silence and the red cheeks the situation demanded from you were not there. Well, maybe they should not be there: you already told him you didn’t regret anything – and in response, he told you the same and promised you would talk about that; you just had to wait until all your business in that city was finished. That was another teaching from your master: you would have to learn what patience means.

H owever, while that time didn’t come, you  had  to concentrate your attentions on what you had in front of you.

\-  Evening, Tobirama-sama – you said in your usual manners.

H e replied to your greeting and entered the room. The cat followed his steps, but stopped in the middle of the way and walked back to the door.

W hen Tobirama approached the bed, his eyes spotted the book you were reading.

\-  This is  a good book.

You agreed, putting it aside on the bed.

\- There’s nothing like this in the shelf of my room. It’s been a while since I’ve read something so good.

\-  I see.

H e sat beside you and took the book in hands.

\- I was reading  it when you passed by my door  last night.

That was the moment when all the blush that didn’t show at his arrival came out  and took over your face .  So that was the book that  seemed to  absorb all his attention when you peeked through his door?  And… he really sensed you while you were looking. Of course  he did . But it was good, even delicate of him to not speak as if you were spying on him, because you weren’t.  It was just something  you couldn’t help  doing .

And now you understood why.

\-  I’ve talked to Mizuki after he came here to see you – Tobirama  e xplain ed while he put the book back where it was –  He told me you were  feeling better,  but I decided to see for myself. However, you were sleeping  when I came ,  so  I left. I’ve spent the  rest of the  day solving some of our matters with the feudal lord, so I did n’t have  a second opportunity to see you  until now.

I f that was an apology, you found it unnecessary. Of course he had much more things to do besides keeping an eye on you. And you were feeling well now,  just a little tired; your case no longer required constant attention.

\- It’s okay – you replied, your fingers tangling the ends of the sheet – I’m better now. I just need to rest and be prepared to do my work.

He nodded.

\- Still, you will need one last dose of the medicine. I believe you will be ready to work tomorrow.  Speaking about work,  the feudal lord and I agreed to make some changes in the original terms of the treaty,  which means that our mission here will not take as  long as we first predicted.  We can go home sooner than we thought.

T hose last words brought you some sort of relief that you didn’t realized you needed until that moment. You didn’t want to think about it,  since you just arrived at that city, but you were  already tired  of being among those strange people, far from the village,  from  the home you knew. If wasn’t for your casual conversations with Chyio, Mizuki and the time the Hokage spent taking care of you, you would be completely lost.

Y ou reprehended yourself:  only a child would have  such thoughts.  Y ou were a woman, and you were there to work.  Yes , all that unforeseen situation affected your health and mood, as it would do to anyone in your place , but you had to be strong, for yourself and for the people who were there with you.

T obirama prepared the new dose of the medicine and explained that this was the last one. Though you were now accustomed to its bitter taste,  you were glad to hear that:  y ou were willing to go back to your normal state, to be able to walk around and do your regular tasks without the need of supervision; besides, you  couldn’t take that constant reminder that you were the cause of so many alterations in the original plans  anymore .  Hearing that everything would be finished soon was precisely what you needed.

  
  


***

  
  


You fell asleep that night with the promise of a better day, and the next morning did not disappoint you.

As soon as you opened your eyes, you sensed that your body’s recovery was almost finished. Your strength and disposition were back, and you felt no pain; the injury in your hand was still an inconvenience, but it didn’t bother you as much as before since you could move your hand freely without the weird sensation in your fragile skin.

When you left the bed and went outside, you noticed that day was warmer than the previous one. You took it as a good sign and walked to your room to take a bath and change your clothes. According to Tobirama, you were finally going to start your work in a few hours, so you wanted to be prepared. You were resting for too long; now, the time to show what you could do and silence the suspicions of the feudal lord has come.

Chyio came with your breakfast, and you talked for a moment. She informed you that the feudal lord was happy for your recovery and willing to see you working alongside the Hokage. You said you were glad for his prayers and ready for your tasks.

At the right time, Tobirama came to see you. He noticed you were no longer pale and that you could walk without help, which brought him visible relief. He explained some details of the work that he didn’t mention before, and when you told him you were a bit insecure, he reminded you of the time you’ve spent preparing yourself as an assistant; Tobirama assured you that he still trusted in your capacity and that an unhappy circumstance like that was far from being enough to change his perception of you, built in several months of familiarity and team work.

Once you were ready, you both went to the feudal lord’s office.

The man was already there, waiting. He greeted you and said he was happy to see you healthy; you thanked him for his preoccupation and explained you were going to do your best. He smiled, and soon you three were in your respective places.

Upon the lord’s table you saw as many paper as you were used to see on the Hokage’s table in Konoha. That didn’t scare you at all: you were also responsible for building some of the piles of documents in the village’s office. Your nervousness came from the conscience of being among a stranger’s piles of paper; you focused on the Hokage’s words before you left the room and in your own experience. In the end, that was all just paper.

You’ve spent the entire morning and  the first  part of the afternoon work ing . There were  many things that needed to be revised and updated, and at first you didn’t know where to start. Fortunately, the feudal lord had some control over his own chaos, and he indicated the necessary steps, so you followed his orientation. The silence in the office was only interrupted by the conversations between the two men, or when you had some question for the lord or needed help from the Hokage.

Time flew as you worked. You were so concentrated in your tasks that you were surprised that the time for lunch came so fast, and after that, to see how quickly the sun went down on the horizon. In the end, the feudal lord complimented your determination to face a long and challenging task like that and apologized for doubting your competence before seeing what you were capable of. He even said he would adopt your methods of organization to maintain the order in his future tasks. You replied that the methods you used to deal with the task were not yours, but were taught to you by the Hokage, and that your credit in this were based on your willing to learn and use such methods.

When you said that  y ou weren’t expecting to  see Tobirama intervening in your favor.

\- Y/n has this habit of not accepting all the credits she deserves for her work – he said, looking directly at you – So I must explain that she is worthy of all compliments, for no one would perform today’s work with the same excellence.

Y ou didn’t say a word to that. Your cheeks blushed as you heard the feudal lord agreeing with Tobirama’s statement.

  
  


***

  
  


Since you were no longer weak and the weather was not as cold as the other day, you had permission to walk on the feudal lord’s garden by the sunset, after you finished your work. It left you a bit tired, that’s true, but  nothing would take your w ill to spend time breathing fresh air and admiring the landscape.

It was a beautiful place to be, especially during  one’s  recovery’s period. There was a bridge painted in red above a dark lake, the water agitated by slow waves around the carps swimming on it. A warm breeze was blowing through the trees, carrying some of their leaves away, as the birds would fly from one tree to another, singing  to the reddish sunset.

You were not alone in that place: the Hokage was walking with you.  Y ou talked about the work for a  while , but the beauty of the garden didn’t let you focus your attention on professional matters for too long, and you remained in silence, only admiring what you had  around you.

When you reached the red bridge, you stopped  in the middle of it  to observe the lake and the extension of the garden, since  the bridge was placed right in the middle of  it.

In fact, you were relieved, even happy that everything ended well. You were ready to travel back home. Although you enjoyed the good things you found out in that place, you missed the village as you never thought to be possible. You missed you house, and your family. Being sick while you were away from them was such an ordeal; you didn’t want it to happen again. However, you knew that if it wasn’t for Tobirama, you’ve already  given up.

And you said  that to him.

\- I know you are going to say it was your duty, but let me tell you how grateful I am for  the time you’ve spent  taking care of me, Tobirama-sama – you started –  It’s strange, but… I felt many things during my sickness, but not for a single moment I  was afraid.

He looked from the lake to you. You smiled.

\- I wasn’t sure of what was going to happen to me, but I wasn’t afraid because you were there with me. I’ve already knew I could trust you when I’m working and training with you, but this time I realized I could trust you with my life.

These words were surprising even to yourself, but you didn’t regret saying them. You noticed a distinct bright in his eyes the moment he heard them. You could only suppose that it was the bright of contentment one feels when they know they accomplish their mission. In the Hokage’s case, hearing a villager stating her trust in her leader was like realizing his life was worthy at all.

Well, that was what you’d say if the circumstances were different, or if you were someone else. But you couldn’t ignore how things happen.  You couldn’t ignore that kiss, the way you easily gave in to his arms around you, the way he said your name a moment before releasing you…  After all,  Tobirama was not immune to you. And thinking of this made your face burn.

But you didn’t have time to blush, for he decided the time for you to speak about that has come. And the conversation followed just as you could expect from someone like him: deep, clear and simple.

\-  Y/n.  I remember saying to you that we would have time to talk about what happened between us  after our work  here is finished.

You nodded.

\- Well. Now it is the time – he turned to you, and you did the same to him – I said I did not regret it.  That’s true, and  after that,  my feelings did not change. In fact,  they only grew deeper.

Your eyes widened.

\- Deeper? What do you mean,  Tobirama-sama?

\-  I think you already know – he smiled – During all this time we have been working and training together, I’ve come to respect and admire you as  the extraordinary woman you are. Soon I realized my feelings for you were different from anything I’ve experienced before, and  I started  considering to talk to you about them. I was not sure if you feel the same  for me , or how you would react once I talked to you, so I waited.  When the mission in this city came, I understood that I’ve wait ed for too long,  but I had no choice, s o I decided I was going to speak to you as soon as we were back  to Konoha. However,  things did not happen as planned, and the circumstances in which we’ve spent our time together  here  were not happy. Still,  I observed you, and  in your manners  I noticed  some signs  that showed me what kind of response I could expect from you.  What I was n’ t expecting was  to have such response so fast.

You were sure your cheeks were as red as the bridge’s paint, but you weren’t uncomfortable. He wasn’t saying that to make you ashamed:  just like at  the moment everything happened, he was just surprised.

Y ou saw a rosy shade coming up to his face as he spoke. Apart from that, his posture remained the same. You kept quiet, willing to hear the rest.

\- That kiss… I myself wasn’t planning that.  But when I saw it was going to happen, I could not stop it. In fact, I did not want to.  If there’s something close to regret among my feelings, is that I wish circumstances were better when it happened. But things are what they are.

S o, that was his side of this story. During the time you  c a m e  to  know each other, became friends and worked together, Tobirama didn’t take too long to recognize his own feelings towards you; on the other hand, he had a hard time trying to find a good moment to reveal them to you. Taking all you knew about him into account, you couldn’t say you were surprised:  despite the honesty of his feelings,  speaking out  about them was never  easy for him .  He told you that many times. So you knew it took all the courage he had to  come and  say those things to you.

But you were glad that he finally spoke, for now you were free to open your heart.

\-  I think it is my turn now,  Tobirama-sama –  you smiled, your cheeks as warm as the sunlight touching the bridge  at that moment – I didn’t take long to notice the change in my feelings for you, but I refused to accept them  for a while. I thought  my circumstances  would speak  against me.  First, I am still young, so I supposed someone like me would never catch your attentions.  And b esides being young, I’m a just a villager.  My parents are good, honest people, but they don’t belong to an important family or clan.  I could never stand the idea of people accusing them of raising their daughter as a gold digger  if I...

H ere you paused, and you both laughed. You never had the habit of using expressions of this kind.

\- It was only when you started my training that I understood I couldn’t keep ignoring my feelings. In fact, I was unable to – your hands were sweating, tangling together as you spoke – Now we were always close to each other. Touching each other. I had to tell myself I wanted more, even with the possibility of never having it. So, when that kiss happened, I didn’t know what to do but to say that I didn’t regret a single second of it.

Y our hands were shakin g,  and your voice was almost gone when you finished your sentence.  However, you were also relieved: there was no need of tension when nothing was a secret anymore.

W hen Tobirama spoke again, his voice was low, although you were alone. He would know if someone w as approaching, of course; still, being cautious was in his blood.

\-  So,  you accept me, y/n?

\- Yes, Tobirama-sama – you whispered – I do.

H e smiled.

\- Even knowing I am grumpy and old and a Senju?

Y ou couldn’t help laughing at this. So that was the way he recommended himself to a girl?

\-  Yes,  I accept you even knowing all of this!

Y ou felt a touch of fingers on your face;  you  put your hand upon his,  then held it and kissed his palm,  keeping it close.  You smiled at its warmth, and decided  that his own words would  lead your way to say  _I love you_ .

\-  Grumpy old man.

When he approached to  put his lips on yours, you passed your arms around his neck and stood on your toes, as he held you in his arms. For a moment, everything was right in the world, for everything was in its right place for you two.


	8. VIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You come back to Konoha, and your routine gain new colors with the change in your circumstances. You are happy with it, but again, your life is about to change.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I will write a chapter 9, otherwise this one would be impossible to read in just one day lol
> 
> And for this one, I want to clarify some things:  
> \- Tobirama and reader are not living together after coming back to Konoha  
> \- The reason for this is simple: I have my hcs where Tobirama is the traditional dude TM, so he wouldn't dream of doing anything before getting married to reader. After marriage he might do anything she wants, but honor comes first :D  
> \- Besides, he has a reputation to maintain as the village's Hokage, and as a believer of the Will of Fire, he must give a good example to his family, the villagers

Tobirama and you decided it was better not  to  announce your date right after going back to the village. Instead, you were going to wait until your routine was reestablished, which would happen in a few days. Right on your first day together, he gave you permission to address him without using the  _-sama_ when you were alone, but you found it difficult and asked him for some time;  this difficult of yours was questioned by him, since you were quick to find him a pet name, but you just smiled and argued that there was  a  difference between the cases. Though he wasn’t convinced, he gave you the time you needed.

The farewell ceremony occurred in the next morning after you started dating. It followed all the demanded protocol, as expected when there was a Kage and a feudal lord involved. You were present, as well as the shinobi who came with you. As the Hokage’s assistant, you were by his side, and right after you was Mizuki. He was no longer worried, and in his eyes you noticed some urge to go back home, although his face remained calm and polite just like the his partners’.

You saw Chyio standing with the other servants and carrying some kind of  small  cage in her hands, but you couldn’t see what was inside it. She has his eyes on the  cage , but once she looked ahead you waved; the girl smiled and waved back.  The feudal lord noticed your interaction, and made a gesture with his hand, telling Chyio to approach.

She came to you and turned the cage’s door to your side. It was when you saw the white little cat in it. You laughed and took the cage. The animal recognized you and started to play with your fingers when you approached them to the cage’s entry.

\- I’ve heard that this cat made friends with you – you heard the lord saying – The animal lost its mother so soon, which I supposed to be the reason why it developed this attachment to you. It would be sad if you were separated from each other, so I am giving it to you as a gift, a way to say thank you for your services.

You thanked the lord with all the sincerity allowed by the occasion. You all finally said your last goodbye to the lord’s people and started your travel back to Konoha.

In the middle of the way, Mizuki, who were also fond of cats, asked if you already thought of a name for the animal, and you replied that you were going to think of  something after arriving at the village.

  
  


***

  
  


You were a bit anxious about all the things you were going to do now that you were back to the village, but you were confident and happy as you haven’t felt in a long time.

The cat took a few days to get used to your house and your routine. Soon, you found a name for it, and when you told it to Mizuki, his reaction was something you could never forget: he laughed hard when you said you were going to give his name to the cat.

When you went to your parents’ house to see how they were doing without you, they greeted you as if they  haven’t see you in a year. There was a time when you’d be annoyed by such reaction, but now you were so happy with your situation that you didn’t mind. You brought the cat for them to see  it and explained it was a gift from the feudal lord after the work you’ve done to organize his papers. Your father immediately fell in love with the animal; your mother wasn’t a great lover of felines, but she praised the lord’s gratitude after keeping you for more time than  was first planned.

In the end, you didn’t have to face many questions about your situation there: your bandage was replaced by some smaller aid during the travel back to Konoha and discarded when you arrived, so they didn’t  find out about the injury; you told  them you fell sick right after arriving at the city, but  the Hokage took care of everything.  A s you expected, it seemed to be enough for them.

However, the lack of an alarming reaction  from them  made you  wonder if they got something in mind. You made no comments about this, but after a few days you got the answer to this mystery:  when you and Tobirama came to their house and announced your relationship, they were happy, but not as impressed as you imagined they would be. Later, during a particular talking, Tobirama said they already knew about you two.

Y ou were shocked.

\- But... how?! Did you say something to them?

He smiled.

\- No. But you forget the fact that they are your parents. They know you as no one else, so when they saw us together at their house, they knew what to expect. Once I laid my eyes on them, they made it clear: they were aware of everything. Our conversation with them only served to confirm their suspicions.

Later, you talked  to them alone and saw it was true.

Your mother was the first to notice, which wasn’t surprising at all: she might have been considering this possibility since that occasion when Tobirama visited you by the evening and gave you that box with candies.  Despite her peculiar way to state her  thoughts , she was genuinely happy for you and was sure the Hokage would never find a better girl.

Y our father, on the other hand, didn’t let his happiness blind his other senses, as the cautious man he was. He recognized the good things that  c ould come from such relationship, but  he  was worried about the practical aspects, just like you were at first. Sharing your own worries with him  was like breathing fresh air after dealing with your mother’s idealism, but even your father had some quirks about this matter.

\- Well, dear, he is  a good man and I need to say I couldn’t be happier for you, but…

He seemed so embarrassed that you started to get worried.

\- What’s wrong, father?

\- I don’t want to be disrespectful or something like this, but the question is that… – then he spoke at once – Well, the question is that, as your father, I need to say that he seems too old for you, dear!

Y ou laughed for an entire minute before you could speak something.

You understood your father’s worries: you were his only daughter and didn’t even reach your thirties, and now you were saying that you were in love with a man who was not just older than you, but was also a powerful shinobi and the leader of the village; and as if it wasn’t enough, you worked for this man. The way your father spoke might have sounded hilarious, but the issues were real, so you assured him that there was nothing to worry about, that the question of your ages didn’t make any difference for you and that you were doing your best to make things work.

  
  


***

  
  


Months passed like weeks.

During this time, you kept working as the Hokage’s assistant. Of course you needed time to get used to your peculiar situation: dating the village’s leader and working for him were two distinct things, and keeping the balance between them was a challenge you needed to overcome. Thanks to his composed and pragmatic methods, as well as your mutual understanding born after a long time of friendship, you two maintained the necessary separation between your work and your relationship. And since you’ve spent more time together, you made all efforts to improve your level of communication and combine your personal talents to make plans and solve unforeseen problems.

Regarding the practical matters, your days were as busy as before, divided between your job, your training and occasional visits to your parents. The main differences were your date and the new responsibility of taking care of the cat, that kept as sweet and affectionate as it was in the feudal lord’s house.

  
  


***

  
  


It was after a day of training that  Tobirama made you the proposal.

You didn’t have much work during that day in particular, so you’ve spent more time than usual in your training. You became physically stronger, your movements were now faster and you improved your ability to direct your strikes, so your exercises were now harder to match this new level. In other words, you were now initiated in the art of taijutsu, which granted you the ability of attacking your adversary instead of only keeping your defenses.

H e was talking about  your progress at the moment.

\- I believe that  now  you  are  capable of facing  three men like that one in the city of …  at once, y/n  – he commented with a smile while stopping one of your punches –  If you managed to make that one run from a fight, I wonder what you would do to him today!

Y ou laughed and started to attack him faster,  using the new tricks you’ve learned with the kunai.

\-  I t’s good to hear that, but i f I was you, I would keep  my eyes on  what’s in front of me , Hokage-sama!

I t was true that lately you’ve been giving him no time to rest during your training, but  your master was still the Hokage,  so he  would  always f i nd a way to disarm you or to stop your punches and kicks. Th ings were  not different  that time : not only  he managed to stop you, but  with one arm he held you close,  leaving a delicate kiss on your ear. You  startled with the unexpected strike and  drop ped your kunai,  but soon you passed your arms around his neck, waiting for his mouth to meet yours.

However, he had something to say before letting it happen.

\- I’ve been keeping my eyes on you for too long –  with his finger, he stroked your chin  and lift ed it, making you look into his eyes – Maybe it’s time for something more.

Your face burned like never before. You  opened your mouth in surprise and your  eyes widened.  You looked for any sign that what he just said wasn’t the same you heard, but in his red eyes, in his smile you saw you weren’t deceived.

\- Are you... you talking about…?

He nodded, then approached his lips to your ear. His voice was a whisper.

\- Yes. And I think I’ve waited too long to tell you this... I believe it’s time for us to live our lives as a family. To share a house and a bed – his arms tightened around your waist while he spoke – Y/n, do you want you to be mine? Do you accept to be my wife?

You’ve been together for a while now, and only a few people knew about it. You  were good with this, but you  couldn’t expect things to be that way forever.  Y ou didn’t want them to, and Tobirama was not the kind of man who’d just let it happen.  If he took some time to make the proposal, it was because he was trying to find the best way to do it, and knowing him as you did, you wouldn’t be surprised  to find out  that  he spent  entire  nights awake thinking of what to do or which words to use instead of just  be ing himself  and mak ing the offer . In the end, that was exactly what he did: the  proposal was simple and clear, as  every sentence, every statement that came from his mouth  until that day.

And this  honesty  was enough to bring a smile to your lips and tears to your eyes.

\-  This is what I want most…  I’ve been dreaming of it  since the first time we kissed… even before… Of course I  accept it!

He took you in his arms and your next moments were spent in a long kiss. You smiled with your lips upon his, your fingers drawing the red lines on his face.

\- Grumpy old man… I’m all yours.


	9. IX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The public announcement of your wedding was made. As expected, when you arrived at the temple to the ceremony, your presence provoked diverse reactions. But you weren't worried, for the most important thing you already have.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry for taking so long to update this! The reason for such delay is simple: there were still many details to organize, and since the text became so long that I had to divide it in two chapters (yay, chapter 10 just ahead!), I've spent a long time revising it.
> 
> But finally the conclusion of the story is here, and I hope you enjoy it ^^

The public announcement of your wedding provoked different reactions from different people, since the entire village was informed.

Your parents remained with the same opinions they formed when you told them about your date, but deeper: your mother couldn’t hide her contentment despite your supplications, but fortunately she managed to control herself when Tobirama was around. Your father had more pride than contentment for your situation, for conquering the heart of a man like the Hokage certainly meant the girl he raised turned into an extraordinary woman, but he was still concerned about the challenges and peculiarities that should be expected from the coexistence between two people of different generations, with distinct views of life in its primary aspects. Again, you explained to him that you two were doing your best and that some things will take time to set on their right place. Taking his own experience with marriage as an example of this truth, you father finally calmed down and wished you all the happiness in the world.

The people you knew were divided. Some of them already knew about you and just said congratulations, but others were surprised by these expected reasons: you were not from a prominent family, nor even a shinobi, and Tobirama was from an important clan and was older than you. But soon they considered your experience working together and supposed that you would find a way to bring your mutual understanding in professional aspects to your relationship. On the other hand, the people of the village were not particularly worried about you: instead, their greatest surprise came from the fact that the stoic younger Senju was about to marry. Who would believe that this man who only had eyes to his mission as their leader could have his heart taken like that? The girl must be a curious creature to accomplish such thing!

You were thinking of this at home one afternoon. You were alone and stated your thoughts to the cat while playing with it.

\- Oh, Mizuki, I can’t stop thinking about how the people of Konoha will react when they see us together. It will certainly be shocking for some, you know?

The animal jumped on your lap and purred in response.

\- I know I should not be worried, and Tobirama told me not to be, but I can’t help it – you caressed Mizuki for a moment – His brother married an Uzumaki woman. And I am just… me. And people talk. And make comparisons. And never get tired of being annoying.

The cat’s reply was to meow and lick your hand. You smiled: its indifference for your situation was almost comforting.

\- I can’t properly understand your opinion, little friend, but whatever it is, I agree with you.

  
  


***

  
  


When the wedding’s day finally came, all your worries and concerns seemed so distant, insignificant that you barely remember them or the feelings they caused during the previous days.

You counted on your mother and a friend of yours to help you with the dress and the ornaments. The two women were about to make a fuzz when you first asked for their services, but you made them swear they would remain composed and quiet about it; you already had many things to worry about. You described to your mother how you wanted your kimono, and she sewed it just like you imagined it: the external fabric was of a delicate pink, while the inner one was of a darker shade, both contrasting with the tone of your skin; the stripe that would be wrapped around your waist had a white background with cherry blossoms as its pattern. Your friend brushed your hair and put red pins on it, which matched your clothing; when you saw its length, you commented that it was probably time to give it a cut, but your friend replied that you would not be allowed to touch your hair until the next day. You laughed and, in response, said that, in return, she was not allowed to touch your face, for you were going to do your make by yourself: you loved your mother and your friend, but you simply couldn’t trust them on this matter.

When everything was ready, you stood on your feet and turned your back to the mirror, to look at them. Only then you saw the tears in your mother’s eyes. You hugged her and told her not to undo her own makeup, to which she laughed and blessed you, and you thought of this maternal talent to foreseen things with unprecedented admiration.

She saw it happening a long time ago. And she really knew better.

  
  


***

  
  


There were many people watching when you arrived at the temple by your father’s side.

The front rows of both sides of your way were formed by shinobi; some of them you’ve never seen in your life, but the others you knew well. Mizuki was among them and, despite his role at the occasion not letting him demonstrate his feelings, you knew he was happy for you. Common people were the majority, but you also recognized members of clans by the emblems on their clothing; all of Tobirama’s students were present, with their respective clans. Some of these prominent individuals were looking directly at you, curious about this girl that apparently no one knew about until that day; because you learned to identify this specific reaction in people, you knew that they were clearly admired of your age, asking themselves what kind of woman you were, or will be to their Hokage. There were others that maintained their composed and respectful attitude, but were not exactly satisfied to see that you were just a girl from the village. You knew something about the culture of these clans, who only permitted marriage between people of their own, and it explained some of the looks you received.

Well, you had nothing to do with that, so you weren’t worried. But you found yourself genuinely surprised when you saw that even the Uchiha sent some representatives. It was with a bit of apprehension that you looked at the place where they were standing, with their intense eyes, as dark as their clothing. Because you knew well that there was no great affection between them and the Hokage, it wasn’t a great surprise that they, more than anyone else, kept all eyes on you. Though their reaction to your passage was not so different from the others, you sensed a deeper shade in it: their eyes saw further, so their judgment must be heavier. Was it something that happened when one come close to the Uchiha, or were you becoming able to sense other people’s chakra? You didn’t know, and now you had no time to think about it, for you just arrived at the temple’s door, and Tobirama was there waiting for you.

There was a cherry tree at the entry of the building. He was standing under it, with his hands behind his back. The external layers of his kimono were of a light shade of blue, while the inner ones were of a dark grey; on his _happuri_ , the emblem of Konoha was present, but the Senju insignia was visible upon the grey fabric as a pattern (it was also on his back, as you would find out later). On his face, the same red lines you touched countless times before, the same serenity you knew, the same solemnity and dignity that in his case meant his beauty, which glowed through each detail. Once the red of his eyes met you, a subtle smile grew on his lips. It was a composed gesture, but it was enough for you to sense the rapture in his feelings. You were holding your father’s arm as you walked; you tightened your grip on it and lowered your eyes when you saw that smile, your cheeks surely as pink as your clothing.

You were so enchanted, so distracted that you startled and stopped immediately when you heard a scream followed by a harsh noise, as if someone stumbled and fell to the floor. You looked at the sound’s direction and saw a child, a little girl on her knees in the space between you and the Uchiha. By her clothing and her dark hair, you saw that she was one of them; apparently, the girl ran toward the front row and ended up stumbling, and the men of her clan were paralyzed, unsure of what to do: how would they react toward a child’s misbehavior in such occasion?

Fortunately for the girl, you had no concerns of that kind, so your reaction was quick. You left your father’s side and ran to the girl, then helped her to stand up and calmed her down.

\- Shhh… It’s okay, honey – you helped her to take the dust of her clothes and wiped her tears – It’s okay…

Soon she stopped crying and stared at you. When you looked down, you noticed a flower on the floor and caught it.

\- Is it yours?

The girl sobbed.

\- I wanted to give it to you. But now it is… – she sighed.

You smiled and put the flower in your hair, with the red pins. The girl’s eyes widened, and she laughed.

\- Well, what do you think? – you asked.

Now the girl seemed to forget about the fall and the dust on her clothes.

\- I loved it!

You asked her name, and she said it was Fumiko. You complimented it and said your name in return. Then, a woman crossed the crowd and approached the girl; because the child resembled her, you understood the woman was her mother.

She apologized to you, holding the girl’s tiny hand. You stood up and nodded.

\- There is nothing to worry about – then you turned to the girl – And thank you for the flower!

The mother’s relief was visible, and the girl laughed at your words. The woman took her daughter in her arms and walked back to her group as they stared in silence. You went back to your father, but heard the conversation between them. “She’s so beautiful, isn’t she, mother?”, the child was saying. “Yes, she is”, the other replied.

When you were back on your way toward the temple’s entry, you noticed a change in the way Tobirama was looking at you. It might have gone unnoticed by the others around, but once you laid your eyes on him, you saw that his respect for you grew deeper after what he witnessed.

Finally, you were in front of him. Your father released your arm; he nodded to the Hokage and stepped back. You smiled to him, and the wrinkles that appeared around his eyes when he smiled back filled your eyes with tears. Your father took a place beside your mother, and right beside them you recognized Chyio and the people of the feudal lord; the lord was with them, with a gentle smile on his face.

When Tobirama took your father’s place, you held his arm and you both entered the temple, where the priest was waiting to start the ceremony.

It didn’t take much time. You two followed the priest’s instructions, made your vows before him and received his blessing. Despite the private attitude Tobirama showed towards affectionate gestures during your period of date when other people were around, which led you to be careful of how and when you would do simple things like holding his hand or kissing him, that was a different occasion. In fact, it was the public demonstration of your love, so an exception was necessary: after the priest’s last words, he approached, putting his finger under your chin and leaving a soft kiss on your lips before walking outside the temple with you.

Now you were free to smile and wave to your friends and family, who seemed to be as happy as you. You were not worried or apprehensive about the people’s looks and thoughts, for none of this mattered anymore. Whether their opinions were favorable to you or not, you were now the Hokage’s wife, and having his love and approval was everything you needed.

You two were happy, and that was all.

  
  


***

  
  


You’ve spent the days before the wedding organizing your things in your house. You separated what you wanted to keep and what you were going to give away, which resulted in piles of boxes around each room – and the only one who seemed happy with this was Mizuki. The cat stood with your neighbor during the wedding: the woman, who was actually the wife of the candy store’s owner – the same one you used to visit almost everyday in your first months as assistant – was an elder lady with physical limitations, so that she couldn’t attend the ceremony. You promised to give her a photograph as a way to compensate her absence and to thank her for taking care of Mizuki.

Fortunately, your mother and two of your friends were there to help you, and the work took half the time it would take if you were left to do it all by yourself. Your friends took some of your things, and your mother took the rest. To speak the truth, you kept only what you thought was going to be essential in your new home, so that all the moving would take little time, just like you’ve planned: you didn’t want to get worried or tired because of it just before the ceremony.

The Hokage’s residence was settled in the same building where Tobirama worked. During all the time you’ve worked as assistant, you never needed to went there, because the Hokage always managed to keep his professional and his personal space perfectly separated: when he wasn’t with his students or on a mission, you would always find him in his office. Such clear boundaries made things easier for you both.

And, well, it’s fair to say that he wouldn’t give you permission to went to his residence before your marriage: with your relationship being of public knowledge, some attitudes of yours would gain different tones in other people’s view. Not only he was careful to maintain his own reputation, but he also wanted to prevent anything that could harm yours: the last thing he would allow was to have people making nasty comments about the girl he loved. Because of this, you’ve only took the most important things with you on the wedding’s day such as your clothes, but the rest was brought on the next day.

Not knowing what to expect from your new house made you a bit nervous. As you walked up the stairs that led to the residence, Tobirama sensed your uneasiness and asked if everything was okay. You quickly replied that yes, you were fine. Though he didn’t go further with the conversation, it was clear that he was trying to figure out the reasons for your anxiety. Were you curious about how your new home looked like? Were you anxious with the idea of being alone there with him? Or was it something else? He would leave you with your thoughts for now, but it was in his nature: he couldn’t help but to wonder.

So when the door was open and you stepped inside the residence, your eyes widened a bit as you looked around. It was more spacious than you expected, but the communications between all rooms were good, and no corner was wasted: the furniture was modest, and nothing seemed to be there without a purpose. The only thing that could be taken as a sign of vanity due to its uncommon quantity were the shelves and piles of books and scrolls, as well as writing supplies – which included pots full of ink stacked beside a working table. Still, everything was set in place with an enviable order.

The first thing that crossed your mind was that this house could not belong to other person but Tobirama Senju, for every corner of it resembled him: the organization, the neatness and the simplicity with which everything was settled attested it.

You heard a muffled laugh behind you. When you turned to Tobirama, who just closed the door, he stared at you with perceptive eyes.

\- I know what you’re thinking.

\- Ah… what? – you stuttered.

\- You’re wondering how I’m able to keep this place in order if I spend so little time in it.

You blushed.

\- Well… yes.

He smiled and made a seal with his hands. Your knowledge of ninjutsu and hand seals was not great, but that one you knew well. And you smiled when you saw a grey smoke column appearing by his side and then fading to give place to an individual who looked exactly like Tobirama. A shadow clone.

\- It is some sort of secret, y/n. My Shadow Clones were not created just to serve as a combat and spying technique.

He made a gesture with his hand indicating the way to the kitchen (it was partly visible from your spot) and the clone went there without a word. You didn’t reply; instead, you laughed at the fact that you would need to get used to have Tobirama’s other selves walking around the house and taking care of daily tasks. It would be a little weird in the first days, you were sure of that, but it couldn’t be that bad.

Or at least it was what you thought looking at the clone working in the kitchen and feeling the emptiness of hungry in your stomach.


	10. X

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You come to learn many things after marriage. Your husband's type of love is one of them. The legitimacy of your father's worries is another one. And the third one is that, no matter how many changes you've been through, the next one will still manage to surprise you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, boys, we finally reached the end! This is the second and last part of the series, and I will miss writing for this work so much I can't even think of this rn...
> 
> Since this chapter narrates the next years of reader's life, it is long, so please do not complain: you have been warned. And because I wanted to avoid spoilers of my own work, I didn't put anything related to this chapter's content in the tags, but I'm gonna list here some things you might expect: honeymoon, implied sexual content, non explicit sex, mention to labor/birth, stress
> 
> I really hope you enjoy this conclusion, and feel free to come back anytime you want! Also, thanks for all the hits, kudos and comments. I never thought this story could get the attentions it had. It was a big surprise ^^ I really want to write more content with Tobirama and other characters from Naruto's universe, but for now, that's all!

You didn’t talk much during dinner. When you finished it, you asked where was the bathroom: you wanted to remove your make up and change your clothes for something more comfortable. And to be honest, you were a bit apprehensive, so being alone for a few minutes would help you to calm down. However, you didn’t say a word about that. Tobirama explained the way for you, and you left the kitchen while his clone was washing the dishes.

When you went back, everything was clean and the clone disappeared. Tobirama spent a moment looking at you while you were standing at the kitchen’s entry; you were on bare feet, wearing a white night gown, your skin now free of the makeup, your hair untied, spreading around your shoulders.

The first response from your husband came in a smile.

\- It seems that you didn’t take long to get used to your new place.

You laughed.

\- Well, I need to try.

He approached and took your hands, passing them around his neck. With his mouth close to your ear, you heard him whisper:

\- I can help you with this.

You smiled, hiding your face on his shoulder; one of your hands squeezed the fabric of his kimono, while the other buried its fingers in his hair. In fact, this was not the same man you used to see everyday for over a year; still, you couldn’t say you didn’t know this one. You still recognized him as a part of the man you knew. Maybe that was a side of him only a few had access, or maybe just you. But you were not confused, nor scared.

You were marveled.

  
  


***

  
  


Tobirama led you to the bedroom and asked you to wait for him there.

The room was just like the others, except for its window, which was larger than the others you saw, and the fact that there was a futon right in the middle of the place. He asked if you want the window to be opened, and you said yes: it would be good to breath some fresh air and look at the twilight. The Hokage’s residence was close to the mountain, so you supposed that the view must be splendid. You weren’t wrong. The last light of the day came in and touched the walls, outshining the lamps hanging on them.

When Tobirama came back, you were still looking at the window, with your arms leaning on the windowsill. You turned to the room’s interior and saw when he sat on the futon with his legs crossed, his right arm leaning upon his knee. He offered his hand for you to come to him; you accepted with a smile as he brought you close, giving you space on his lap and surrounding you with his arms. He was without his _happuri_ and was dressed for the night, but the red marks were still on his face; you touched them with your fingers, then kissed each one of them.

For a moment, you just stood like this, smiling to each other, caressing each other. You weren’t worried; you had time. You talked for a minute or two, about you two and the life you were about to build there. It was not going to be easy, but you wanted it, so you were ready. As much as you were ready for each other now.

You put your hands on his shoulders and leaned for a kiss; he held you by the waist, making you approach. You knelt and smiled when he sustained you: you loved to witness him using his strength; apparently, he liked the way you always reacted to it, for his hands pressed your sides, tightening their grip around you. You touched his jaw while you kissed him, feeling the heat coming up to your face and your whole body.

Tobirama sensed this change and responded accordingly, deepening the contact. With your hand on his hair, you laughed, remembering that time when you first kissed: when you did exactly what you were doing right now, he stopped you, with visible surprise. Now, he just let you proceed.

\- Aren’t you going to stop me this time? – you whispered.

He groaned and passed his arm around you.

\- Do you want me to?

\- No – his robe was untied; you slipped your hand inside it and moved it away, the fabric falling from his shoulder and leaving him on bare chest – Grumpy old man.

For a moment, he took his hands off you and got free from the robe; you saw when it was tossed on the floor beside you. Then he held you and helped you lay on the futon, your body hiding in the penumbra, your hair spreading over the mattress’ fabric. You surrounded his neck with your arms as he leaned upon you, his hands occupied with the delicate work of undressing you from the gown, unveiling your body. You sensed your heart pounding in your chest when you first realized what he was doing, but you had no reasons to be afraid.

As he used to be in all aspects of his life, Tobirama was not a man of many words on the matters of love. But words didn’t make any difference; words would not fit him. His talents lied on action above all. If there was a word that you would choose to describe this man’s type of love, it would be deep. Deep and slow was his pace, as the scientist he was, but nothing was done without a purpose. The way his hands, his mouth would go all over your body – your feet, your legs, your thighs, your belly, your breasts – was not only a sign of devotion, but a study. He was observing you, learning from your reactions, coming to know the woman he was about to have so that he could make things good for her in every single detail. And the growing rapture created by his hands convinced you that no one could do it better than him.

With your eyes half closed, you saw his face was as red as his eyes while his hands were occupied with you. The vision of those narrow, keen eyes glowing in the half light over you only deepened your heat, and a low moan escaped from your mouth. You sighed when he touched you to see if you were ready. You were; so he laid upon you and with all the sweetness he could, he surrounded you with his arms to bring you closer: with one hand, he held your thigh and passed your leg around his waist; you understood the gesture and did the same with the other leg, tightening your grip around him. His lips were upon yours, and then down on your chin, your neck, your clavicle. Your tiny hands would go from his hair to his shoulders and his back, sometimes caressing them, other times squeezing and scratching them; he laughed with his lips on your skin, warming it up with kisses.

You closed your eyes and repeated to yourself how much you loved him when Tobirama brought your body to his and finally made you his woman.

  
  


***

  
  


The rest of that day remained blurry on your memory, just like a dream.

You remembered being surrounded by his body’s heat, his strength and his desire for you, having your own body overreacting at every touch of his hands that you barely managed to give him a proper response. When he released you, you were warm and sweaty, breathing fast and with some sort of numbness on your limbs, but you were not tired. You were satisfied until the last inch of your body. He laid by your side and you turned to him, lying your head on his chest. You tried to think of something to say, but you were sleepy and couldn’t find the proper words. But it didn’t bother you: now he knew everything he was supposed to know about you, and whatever your next move, he would understand it. Your legs entwined with his and you forgot about the rest.

You probably woke up at some moment of the night, for you had a vague memory of seeing the moonlight spreading on the floor close to your spot. You had his arms around you, so you didn’t feel cold. You might have turned to him and touched him, asking him to make love to you again, but you weren’t sure. You could be dreaming.

You opened your eyes in the next morning as the first light of the day entered the window. You sensed there was a soft fabric covering you; you looked down and saw a blanket. When you turned on the futon, you felt the beginning of pain spreading all over your body. Was that what the last night did to you? Maybe. Did you exaggerate? Well, who knows. Were you going to feel a bit sore all day long? You prayed you weren’t. Still, you weren’t really hurt. And even if you were, you still wouldn’t regret anything.

You pulled the blanket and sat on the mattress. You were alone in the room. The door was half opened, and a warm light entered through the gap, forming a yellow beam on the floor beside you. Through it was also coming the scent of hot tea and food, spreading around the air as an invitation. You smiled while you left the bed and picked up your things, preparing for a warm bath before breakfast.

You left the room with a new gown and a robe around it. You walked on bare feet across the corridor that led to other spots of the residence, still trying to get used to them. In fact, you sensed some discomfort as you walked, but it wasn’t enough to make you worry.

The scent of breakfast became stronger as you approached the kitchen. When you reached its entry, you saw an organized table, with two bowls and hashi beside them. There was also tea, ready to be poured on the cups. Your husband was occupied with the content of a pan; you couldn’t see it from your spot, but the steam and the smell coming up from it was enough to fill your mouth with saliva.

Suddenly, the vision made you smile. The possibility of seeing the Hokage preparing his own meals never crossed your mind before: now that you were there, you were unconsciously expecting that this task would fall on your shoulders. That seemed so simple, so… domestic for him. However, as you thought about it, it it started to make sense: he was the second of four brothers, and all of them use to spend long periods far from home, even at an early age; and as far as you knew, it wasn’t common to see women taking part in the battles of that time, so cooking should not be something strange to those men. In the end, realizing this made you think about one of your favorite things about him: the capacity of doing anything that was necessary without questioning the nature of the task.

His voice brought you back to reality.

\- Won’t you come here and take your place, y/n? – he said without turning to you – Or is it more interesting to stay at the kitchen’s entry?

You laughed. Here in your house, with no one listening but you, his tone was softer, and there was even a subtle attempt to make a joke. You approached and passed your arms around his waist, standing on your toes to look over his shoulder as he cooked.

\- Good morning for you too, grumpy old man – you smiled – Now I understand why I was never able to show up to work before you. You simply don’t sleep!

\- Of course I do. And, as you probably know, there were some days when you met some of my clones, not me. Sometimes, when there’s too much to be done, I send them before me while I take care of myself. When they come back to me, I know exactly what they did, including if they interacted with you. This is the reason why you didn’t notice any difference when you dealt with them or me.

\- Ah… I see.

You didn’t say much, first because this use of the clones only occurred to you right at that moment, and you didn’t want to look stupid for revealing this, and second because you just discovered your first peculiarity about being married with Tobirama Senju: he was the only man in this world who would greet you in the morning with a lesson about a ninjutsu created be him.

  
  


***

  
  


Despite the fact that you both took the next day off, that was a busy day.

Still in the morning, you went to your former neighbor’s house to bring Mizuki with you. Since the cat knew the woman, it wasn’t that difficult for her to take care of it, but it missed you, and when you came to take it, the animal made that clear. You gave the woman the photograph of your wedding as you promised, and she thanked you many times.

And though you counted on two people to help you with the packaging of your things in your old house, there was still some stuff for you to take off there. After leaving Mizuki with your husband – who stood away from any form of work after one hour of insistence from you – you went there and took the rest of your things. After a last look at every room, you locked the house and gave the keys back to the owner.

You knew the feudal lord and his people were staying in the village for one more day, so during the afternoon you went to the place where they were hosted and asked about Chyio: you wanted to talk to her before their departure, and since it was going to happen soon, she was certainly busy.

You met her and you two greeted and hugged each other like two sisters. She said she couldn’t be more happy for you, and revealed that even during your mission in … she sensed the way the Hokage used to treat you was different from what she would expect, considering the fact that you were his assistant; to speak the truth, the only one who was caught off guard by the wedding’s invitation was the lord himself. When you finally asked how she was doing, she said she found an enchanting young man months ago and now they were dating. She explained that she expected them to start talking about marriage soon, and you replied that if he was as wise as Chyio described him, he would do it before her and that you were expecting an invitation soon.

  
  


***

  
  


The easiest part of your common life was to organize and share the daily tasks. First, because you both had good habits on this matter and were used to work together, something derived from your professional partnership. Second, of course, was because Tobirama always knew how to take advantage from his shadow clones: when they stood at home taking care of everything, you two could concentrate on your primary work.

Yes, you kept working as his assistant after marriage, not just because you wouldn’t accept to be only a housewife, but also because you were a capable worker. Besides, it was easier for the Hokage to keep working with someone who was known to him and already had experience, being trained by himself.

It was harder when he had to leave the village to solve important things or when he was teaching his students, because you had to take care of everything without the help of the clones. But you tried your best, and at least you had Mizuki’s company during these periods.

Alongside your function as his assistant, you still had your physical training. Your adaptation with small weapons was now on such a level that Tobirama was considering to teach you how to use the sword. When he told you about that, your first reply was to say that it would be funnier if you were taught how to do impressive things like walking on water’s surface or climbing a tree without using your hands: it’s been an entire year since you started training; you must have developed some control over your chakra pathway by now, right? Tobirama wasn’t sure, but he decided to try it anyway.

And to the surprise of you both, you managed to climb a short tree trunk after practicing for some time.

  
  


***

  
  


Of course your life was not perfect, despite your efforts.

One of your greatest difficulties was regarding your different personalities and opinions on essential matters. While you had some sensibility and patience over people’s feelings, Tobirama didn’t have great talent with these things, so that sometimes he would seem and sound scary even for you; the same rule was applied when he had to talk about his feelings: some things must be pulled out from him. On the other hand, he had persistence and practicality as his second name: he would spend all his free time studying and practicing shinobi techniques if he was left alone, even when this free time meant just a few hours; you, on the other hand, had a tendency of lose your concentration when dealing with things that didn’t have connections to your work, so you would never have such willpower. Was that a reason why you’d probably never be a shinobi? Maybe. But you wouldn’t accept any criticism over this.

Even harder than that was to conciliate your divergent visions about raising kids. You agreed to wait for at least one year or two before planning to have your first child, both to take time for yourselves and to state how you would do it, but it speaking is easier than doing, because in this case you were dealing with something you couldn’t change: the way each one of you were raised. And from that came your first reason to get into a serious, heated argument: to him, your soft way to proceed could turn the child into a spoiled brat, while to you his method could become so hard that it would end up erasing the kid’s sensibility and traumatizing them. When this happened, you finally understood your father’s worries regarding your distinct ages and education. As a husband and a parent, he knew what he was talking about.

It was also when you two realized how useless was to be inflexible when it comes to deal with the person you loved and shared a life with. After an entire day of tension and seriousness on your work, the energy was so overwhelming that you had to engage in a conversation and apologize before going to sleep. Well, actually, you talked for a minute and ended up making love. It was when you decided that you’d only consider an argument to be finished after this.

  
  


***

  
  


When your first child was born, you two realized that all of your previous arguments and discussions about the perfect method of education were futile.

It happened during your third year together, after some time of attempts. The child was a girl. Since she was your firstborn, the physical, emotional and mental changes derived from the pregnancy scared you, and you never found your mother’s advice so useful. When the time for you to give birth came, your body was under such pain that you thought nothing in life could surprise or scare you after that if you survived. Well, you survived, just to find out you were deceived.

When you first laid your eyes on the child, they widened: her hair was thick, and had two opposite shades – on one side it was as dark as your own, while the other was white. You didn’t understand it until Tobirama came to the room to see you two and recognized this peculiarity: one of his younger brothers had his hair divided in two different colors just like this. But it was something so uncommon that he never expected to see it in another member of his family.

Because it was raining that night she was born, you named the girl Amaya.

As she grew up, you realized that it was better to adapt your original plan of raising to the person she was about to become. Because she was your first, it was a challenge like no other, but once you discovered her blooming personality – Tobirama stated that she resembled you, and that the two shaded hair was the only obvious thing from his side – your work became a little easier. Later, your husband changed his opinion and admitted that Amaya resembled his brother’s sensibility and gentleness.

Two years passed and your second child came. This time, you had a boy, and by the fact that Tobirama was away from the village by that time, you were anxious. Your father stood with your girl and your mother came to help you at home, but the absence of the children’s father was sensed by you whenever you thought about it. However, your experience with Amaya gave you more confidence, at least over the practical aspects of taking care of a baby.

Still, this one brought his own challenges with him: he was your first boy, and when you took him in your arms for the first time, you noticed that almost everything in him resembled his father; when the baby first opened his eyes, they were as red as his. Tobirama seemed surprised with your opinion, because to him the boy resembled your father except for his eyes. You laughed and never mentioned the subject again. In the end, you were right, for as the boy grew up, his similarities with his father just deepened, from his appearance to his manners. You chose to call him Shuji.

Amaya and Shuji were too different from each other; their personalities, preferences and ways of learning made them the complete opposite from each other. Because of this, conflicts between them became common. By this time, the matters of the village and the training of students were taking a huge part of the Hokage’s time, so you’ve spent more time with the children: your functions as assistant were heavily reduced when the girl came, and with Shuji’s birth you had to leave your work. Such change was not easy, because you loved your job, and having to leave it to handle those kids’ fights were consuming your energies and your patience. Even Mizuki sensed the uneasiness and started to flee from human company.

As they grew up, the best you could do was to keep them separated as long as possible, occupied with tasks appropriate for their age such as organizing their rooms, but it was a fragile balance and you couldn’t expect to keep things like this forever, so when Tobirama finally had a free time, you talked to him about this. He was aware of the problem and, despite not having time to handle it, he was thinking of something that could fix it: since Amaya had more affinity with you, you were going to dedicate your time primarily on her education, while Shuji was going to spend more time with his father, who was in better conditions to understand his personality and talents.

The plan worked, and the conflicts between the two children diminished as time passed. But that was not the only good thing that came from it: your mind and your body finally got time to rest, and soon you had your energies restored. This happened alongside a period of peace in Konoha, when Tobirama had less things to deal with and his students were improving, so he didn’t need to supervise each of their movements as before. All of this meant more time for yourselves, so you created a rule for your children: just like they were used to deal with their father’s shadow clones during the day, they would have to count on them if they needed something at night. They accepted this strange rule and made no questions, since they were too young to understand the reasons behind it.

Speaking of it, there was a particularity that you both decided to maintain, for the good of your relationship: no matter the circumstances, Tobirama never used his clones to replace him when he had sex with you. Yes, sometimes he would let one of them to caress you or make you some company, but the primary act was always with him. Somehow, because you soon learned to differentiate a clone from a real human being, you always sensed that it would not be the same thing if you were taken by a clone, and things were good this way.

You took all the advantage you could from that peaceful period, so there was a longer gap between the birth of your second and your third child. When this one came, Amaya was almost seven years old.

This was also your hardest pregnancy: you weren’t as young as during the previous ones, and the tiredness and discomfort increased faster as the months passed. Just a few days before the child was born, you talked to your husband and explained that you couldn’t carry a fourth child.

You were lying on the bed (you had to replace the futon) with three pillows on your back, and had the cat taking a nap close to your feet at the occasion.

\- My body is not the same, and we already have enough work with Amaya and Shuji – you were saying – Besides, with all our obligations, specially yours as the Hokage, how could we expect to make time for so many children?

Tobirama was looking through the window. Though his attention seemed to be on the vision out there, he was listening.

\- In fact, we can’t – he replied – When Shuji was born, I was not there with you. Even now I regret it, though I was away for important reasons. When I came back, I noticed how tired you were. It was different from the time when Amaya came. I know I will be here when the third come, but we can’t make sure that this will happen in case of a fourth child, and who knows the complications you would endure if it happened?

You sighed.

\- I believe that I only managed to carry this one thanks to all my training – you put your hand on your belly; the child moved under your touch, and you smiled – But I don’t know what’s going to happen after their birth.

Your husband turned his back to the window and the night out there. You saw a confident bright in his eyes when he spoke to you.

\- We will handle this, y/n. As we have been doing all this time.

During your labor, you suffered like you didn’t when you gave birth to the other children. The pain was so deep that you couldn’t control your screams, and started to fear for the baby and yourself. The only thing that helped you to stand your ground was to know that your husband was right outside the door, and he would do anything for you two.

Things ended up well. The baby was alright; you were exhausted, but despite this, you were going to recover, even if you needed twice the time for it.

Your third child was another boy. With him, you had another surprise: he was as different from his brothers as they were different from each other. His appearance didn’t resemble anyone in your family, nor from your mother’s side nor from your father’s, so that you supposed it had something to do with the Senju’s blood.

When Tobirama came to see you, his surprise was even bigger than when he saw Amaya for the first time. You could see it in his eyes when they laid on the boy.

\- So, what’s the resemblance this time? – you whispered.

He smiled. This time, you sensed some sagacity in his manners.

\- If you promise not to overreact, I may tell you what I think.

You rolled your eyes.

\- If only I could overreact in my circumstances…

He approached and took the baby’s tiny hand.

\- This dark hair… this skin tone… It is too soon to be sure, but my senses say that he will become the living image of my elder brother.

And so you understood why he asked you not to overreact. Your third son, a living image of the First Hokage? That was a surprise like no other. In fact, you were familiar with Hashirama’s appearance, both because his face was carved on the rock and because you’ve seen some pictures of him before, but you didn’t make connections with him at first. Now, you looked at your son again and started to consider such possibility.

Whatever the case, you soon agreed that no name would fit the boy like his uncle’s.

  
  


***

  
  


If there was something like a favorite child, you were not sure, but after your experience with all your kids you believed that there were children who were easier to handle than others. In your case, the young Hashirama was one of those children.

For he was your youngest and you had to get through so much pain to bring him to this world, you felt some difference in your connection with him, and the boy probably felt the same about his mom, for he became so attached to you that, once he learned to walk, he started to follow you around the house just like Mizuki used to do. The cat, that got back its calm temper after the problem with Amaya and Shuji was solved, became the baby’s best friend; the animal’s name was one of the first words he learned.

Hashirama was even more sensitive than his sister, and had the same unquiet curiosity of his brother, but unlike them, he had difficulties to spend time away from you, even after growing up. When he was little, you used to sit in the living room with him in your arms by the afternoon, when all the work was done and you two needed some rest. When Tobirama came home, he used to find you sleeping together.

You kept this habit until the boy was three. One day, you were awake when your husband arrived and saw him sleeping in your arms.

\- You will end up spoiling the boy, y/n – he warned you.

\- Hashi knows exactly when he has to go to his bed – you replied – And he never disobeys me. I see no problem with this.

Tobirama didn’t say anything, though he disagreed. You’ve learned a long time ago that starting an argument right when one of you came home was a terrible idea.

In the end, Hashirama didn’t become spoiled. He just took a long time to become independent from you, compared to his brothers. But they had their own reasons to develop their autonomy faster: Amaya appreciated spending time alone, and since she got along with her grandfather, she used to stay with him during the weekends; Shuji, as the perfect image of his father, learned soon how to manage his tasks by himself, and dedicated much of his time studying and training, for he set as his life goal to become a powerful shinobi. You never talked about it with your husband, but you suspected that Hashirama was not going to follow his brother’s steps in this matter.

One night, you were lying by Tobirama’s side, thinking about your family’s future. You were quieter than usual, and when he asked what you got in mind, you just said that you were thinking about your current days.

\- Things are changing faster now – you whispered – They’re growing up. My parents are getting tired. Mizuki is getting old. Even I am no longer the same.

He smiled and passed his arms around you.

\- Nor am I. If there was a way to stop this, I would find it. But unfortunately, there isn’t.

\- I know. But I’m not complaining. I love everything we built here. But changes are still hard to handle.

\- Yes. Just when we think we are used to them, they find a way to surprise us.

You leaned in and kissed him.

\- And that's the best part of it, grumpy old man.

Surprise. That was the word you’d use to describe what you felt with everything that happened to you until that moment. You never thought life could bring you to such places. If it wasn’t for the challenges and the pain you endured in all those years, you could say you were caught in some sort of genjutsu. But the good things that came were there to remind you that this was no genjutsu. It was the result of years of love, effort and hard work, things that became part of your nature.

No, that wasn’t a genjutsu. It was just reality.


End file.
